[Shipping][Comedy] Twixie time! I love that term! Twixie Twixie Twixie.
The Greatest most Powerful Story on the blog –Seth
OH GOD IT UPDATED
Author: Gravekeeper
Description: Twilight Sparkle is summoned to settle a legal matter involving The Great and Powerful Trixie… What in Equestria did she do now?
All Chapters After the Break!
equestriadaily 
>Friendship Lubricant
> Legal Affairs
>[Shipping]>Friendship LubricantYOU HAVE MY ATTENTION.
Trixie best not fuck Twilight over.That said; This is fantastic, eloquent and flows well. I'm looking forwards to the next parts!
I no rite?Wtb moreOh god my WoW is coming back.
I want the story about the magic of drinking too!
GREATEST OPENING LINE EVER.
Twixie? LOL.
Damn it, I already read this far, why won't he type faster! You have your 5 stars, gimmie more!
Friendship Lubricant.ಠ_ಠ
Okay, this is the kind of shipping I love: overly adorable and hilarious.Damn, I wish you could write this faster. I'm loving every chapter. Think I'm gonna re-read these when I get back from work. 😛
This is looking very promising and humorous. Consider my interest piqued.
There's a Comedy tag!? Gosh, you went out of your way to make sure I'm going to read this one, didn't you!
Friendship LubricantNot sure if want.Also nice implied AJ/RD. Do like.
Vodka ! 😀
I had used the term twixie in a forum and here i thought it was original… *sob*
[comedy] new tag!
I am pleased! An absolutely excellent piece of work so far. I like how we appear to be following two different tales at the same time, brushing on what's going on at the Library, before going back to Manehatten.LOVED the touch-down in the city itself, and the scenery description. Gives me the warmsies. Also, I smell incoming Pies to further complicate things!Looking forward to seeing this finished!
Looking forward to more.
Impressive. Excellently made. This is turning out to be interesting story. I want more but, alas, I have to wait on that. I hate hangovers.
>Oh Celestia, I can't believe I cast all over Trixie's face like that!
"oat-dog vendors poaching boiled cabbage, boombox-carrying street studs"I see what you did there…
Very funny, but a few scenes are written slightly confusing and a lot seems quite a bit over the top. It seems like you have way too much fun with those characters than what would be healthy 🙂
I noticed you had a comedy tag.This… this is really good comedy. Seriously speaking, the writing style transitions smoothly in between descriptions, expositions, character thoughts, and brilliantly done dialogue with ease and maximum hilarity. I absolutely adore how you can use several character POVs so smoothly without losing focus on the story at large.In the first chapter, I absolutely the numerous, incredibly subtle and aside styled jokes about "Friendship Lubricant" (a term I will be using now, thanks to you), particularly with what happened to Applejack and Rainbow Dash after they had more than their acceptable fill. The joke with Twilight's hang over (particularly with the "Kill Me Now!" line, tailored to Spike's abilities), and the numerous well placed descriptions of what she did last night (the door and Twilight's attempts to open it killed me).The main conflict was excellent. Vague enough to keep us waiting, in character enough to not have any sort of disastrous crash of disbelief. I honestly believed that Trixie was in trouble for the Friendship Reports. Chapter 3 was a brilliant, in character, and totally logical thing, but I'll get to that later.Rarity wrongly putting two and two together was fun. It was rather amusing to see Rarity being so concerned over what she thinks is a Fancy Hot Date, and Twilight being so embarrassed about it.The Limousine team was a wonderfully affectionate side-crew; hilarious, but not main characters in their own right, yet easy to remember. The Dry, Dry, Would I?! gag was brilliant.The Shipping was what got me particularly hooked. I was especially interested in how you didn't utterly destroy Trixie like many others, and instead made her rise again like the beautiful if boastful star we know she is. Also, Twilight being that honestly concerned was rather nice, and the anger was a decent touch.
Spike's musings on Twilight Sparkle's drunken activities that were not mentioned last chapter were brilliant. The amour with the book, and the mention of Twilight being angry and betrayed earlier was hilarious. The purple prose with Barf duty was especially funny. Should I mention that I forgot to mention how impressed I was that Spike was impressed with Twilight's upchucking skills? I should, shouldn't I?The setting of Manehattan was lovely. I absolutely adored the fast but very descriptive scene montage, especially with the activities going on in the street reminiscent of extras going about in their daily lives being so out of the way yet very clear.The skyscraper was very clear to me (alas, I only see them occasionally), but I really liked the statue of the particularly powerful Pegasus on the front.Twilight's getting angry and happy at the same time was hilarious. Trixie realizing her sorry mistake, and Twilight bursting into flames once more killed me.The sudden whiplash from anger to just plain despair was incredibly comedic. I just loved to imagine Trixie's face, whens she was being raged at and sobbed into at the same time, with all the reporters watching.Your use of powerful lines in paragraphs are amazing. I usually separate them, but your combining them so perfectly with paragraphs was excellent. The situation being hilarious, logical euphemism helped, too.Twilight's despair about the premature casting was… *snerk*. Oh stars, that was lovely. Next to wing boners, horn discharges are my favorite sign of pony "affection".The scene with Holly Diver's out of place "reward" was funny. Rafale's pondering whether or not to kill and bury her captain was a funny, if somewhat awkward, ender.
Cutie Mark Crusaders: Royal Squadron: Dragoon Squadron: Special Ops was absolutely hilarious (with thanks to the Colon Cancer you gave it, of course), especially when put against the backdrop of Rarity's peace and quiet. Their weaponry and armor was doubly hilarious, especially with Scootaloo's sword which was larger than her and Sweetie Belle's halberd on a horn. (I see what you did there. Clever.)The travel in between dimensions confused me at first, and Pinkie Pie's addition didn't really help. It was rather brilliant, however, especially with Pinkie Pie mentioning that Twilight was only ever there for painfully short amounts of time. Trixie's random thoughts were nice, too.The mention of the movie was rather nicely done, particularly with how Ms. Diver was barely holding in her left over laughter from outside.Twilight Sparkle's embarrassment and the reinforcement of the euphemism pretty much killed me. The mention of her not being 14 again pretty much cemented Horn Discharges as a new favorite of mine.The shipping part in the elevator was nice. I liked how you put Trixie in no mood to talk, and yet has to for the sake of Twilight. The thoughts were nice, too, especially with how awkward and impressed Twilight was being.The sudden change, and the onomatopoeia was very clever, actually. I always have issues with how to break up dialogue with crashes, booms, shots, and kicks to where the sun don't shine, and seeing you do it so smoothly was rather impressive.Trixie's hilarious summary of Twilight's condition made me laugh, especially the third. I almost forgot about it till you mentioned it once more.The awkwardness of Trixie cleaning up Twilight and the increased awkwardness and confusion in their thoughts was amusing to read, particularly with how Trixie mixes insults and compliments into a single sentence.I adored Trixie's love/hate thoughts. It was especially lovely when she was thinking about how good Twilight looks, any day of the week. Her cleverly goading Twilight for answers was very in character.The smoothness of Trixie's using the "Mortal Enemy" thing to tell Twilight of her character's role was lost on me, but it was very clever.I can't wait to see how you go about this.If it may be too much to ask, could you, maybe, star Fluttershy in this, and show that her method of acting can get a little too realistic at times, and awkwardly so?
I really do love the term Twixie. So catchy. Don't know about the story, going to read it tomorrow.
Wow, guys! I never expected such a warm response! I wasn't actually sure if I was gonna submit it at first, cause I haven't written anything in eons, but these ponies are too confoundedly fun- I won't make this too long by replying to everyone, but I've definitely read and enjoyed each comment so far!@Anonymous (2:31PM), I was *this* close to mentioning fetlockless gloves.@Acrianna You're completely right on both counts, which is why I was hesitating a bit on releasing this fic or not. I'm actually more of a comic-book artist, so I tend to imagine the shots happening in my mind in comic or cartoon form, then I just write down what I'm visualizing- so I know that I may sometimes write something that isn't very clear in words but was very vivid in my head.And yes, I like over-the-topness, so very, very much.@ruff1298 Wow- you've completely floored me with your review and praise! Your descriptive enjoyment of my story was a fun read on its own- I didn't think anyone was gonna catch on to what Pinkie Pie was referring to- color me impressed! I've really got my work cut out for me if I'm to keep you all happy! :DAs for the rest of the mane cast, chapter 4 will have one of them share the spotlight with our Twixie, but it won't be Fluttershy, for now at least (sorry ruff!)
I voted this 5 stars before I even read it.
NEVER sign a contract in Manehattan…..Theres nothing those clausules can't force you to do.
Awesome stuff as usual. Requesting artwork of Holly Diver and The Miss Spelling.
I never everypony has already said this but…"Friendship Lubricant"?? ಠ_ಠ
Scratch that "never" supposed to be know. Sorry D:
>read first part>Holly DiverI SEE WHAT YOU DID THERE
Rainbow Dash, Attorney at Law? This should be very interesting. I'd love to see how Rainbow Dash quick-thinks (or not) through this situation, with her zero to little knowledge in actual law.I can also imagine the painful awkwardness and the not so subtle "get the hell out of here!" volleys between Twilight, Rainbow Dash, and Trixie.Weaponized Rarity really is stylish. I especially like the varying reactions from them, most especially the one from Rainbow Dash.Speaking of Rainbow Dash, you have an excellent way of making people do a double-take like in cartoons. I honestly did not read the part about cyan-hooves very well, and was completely taken aback and pleasantly surprised when it turns out that Rainbow Dash was cramped in Twilight's cabinet with her cereal and spices.Pinkie Pie was also excellent in her incredible stealth. I love how you just subtly added Pinkie Pie in only for the others (and the readers) to discover her only after a couple of lines when the shock really sets in.I pride myself in my ability to see small details. Your proving me incompetent at that was absolutely lovely.Fluttershy being hungover after being the heaviest drinker was perfect. I always had this image in my head, of Rainbow Dash puking rainbows at 63 her, 372 Fluttershy. Since the latter is tipsy, she accidentally calls Rainbow Dash a wimp. (She apologizes soon after, of course.)Rarity's shock and the great accenting was wonderful. The way that the two "What?!"s were totally parallel to each other was strangely amusing, and her terminology for Trixie was awesome.Pinkie Pie and the Crusaders suddenly baking cakes was deliciously random, pun unfortunately not intended. It's just so like the Pink Pony and the group to appear out of mother-effin nowhere and start doing stuff.Brilliant work with yet another case of Colon Cancer. Though not as hilarious as the last one, it's still a great stealth pun at a certain series of Law Games that suffers from the same terminal disease.On second thought, maybe Rainbow Dash DOES know law. That would be interesting.
haha chapter 4 was great, cant wait to see what applejack does in chapter 5 😉
This story is marvelous and needs to continue, for great justice.
This is great! Looking forward to the next part.
This is hilarious! Oh my, I can't stop laughing! Rainbow Dash II, ESQ! HA!
YAAAAAAY A NUPDATE!
Holly Diver? somepony is a Dio fan.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QuVfrLh9Oz4
"'Yeah! CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS: PROFESSIONAL LEGAL COUNSEL: JUSTICE FOR ALL!' cheered Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, and Pinkie Pie, all covered in cake mix."…That may be one of the greatest sentences I've ever read in my entire life.
This is the first fanfic that actually got me to lol irl…..yay! I highly approve of this storyline, and hope it continues into many more.
"unintentionally spraying Trixie's face for the second time that day""second time"wait wat?
@AnonymousThe first time was when Twilight and Trixie's horns touched.
^ lol….again
Lubricant is required since it is required to ease the strain of something getting forced into something else. In this case, friendship. True story.
MEIN FUHER, I CAN WALK!
YAY A NEW CHAPTER! 😀 Looking forward to the next one already! :3 Read it already. XD
YAY A NEW CHAPTER! 😀 Looking forward to the next one already! :3 Read it already. XD
Hilarity overload.
OBJECTION !WE ARENT EVEN IN COURT YET !So awesome. The best thing about this part is despite all the stupidity dash doles out some sound legal advice at the end of it all.
Twilight and Trixie getting caught playing hoofsie under the table was hilarious.I also love 'Miss Spelling.' I take it her special talent is poor writing?
Love this story so much.Doesn't AJ miss her hat?
Ah, so the gloves come off. I absolutely adore how Miss Spelling is now going to through everything to the wind, now that her being fired is totally assured.I loved how outrageous Rainbow Dash was being. I particularly loved how she pointed out the problem that wasn't there, that Trixie was simply following the protocol of several useless ponies to fill in the space, and not intimidate Twilight into signing.The bit with Twilight thinking of how her part was obviously going to be smile was a lovely thing to read. I never would have done something like that, and now that I see it, wow, is it appropriate.Trixie having even more emotional turmoil on her hooves will prove to be a rather interesting thing.Adding the other mane cast will prove to be even more interesting.
Ugh Damn you! you know just how to cut a story off and keep me begging for more >.< I hope you write fast lol.
"Friendship Lubricant" has to be the best tag for anything ever.This story looks like an interesting read, so I'll give it a shot.
I'm pretty sure I was hooked the moment I read the term "drunk research." Also, as said numerous times above, "friendship lubricant" is a proper term for alcohol from now on.You really do write well, and in very comic style – I pretty much have to echo ruff's thoughts from the above posts.I repeatedly laughed out loud at various points.Also, you are making me like Trixie. Her confused thoughts are really amusing to read 😀
You guys are awesome- reading your comments is great fun and fuels my writing fire (and keeps me up all night writing when I should be sleeping!)Whenever I submit a chapter, I tend to stay in the Googledocs chat for a good while, so don't be afraid to say 'Hi' if you see me there-And since there's been a couple of requests here and in the Googledocs chat, I did a quick sketch of Rarity after chapter 3, as well as Miss Spelling and Holly Diver with their Cutie Markshttp://img.photobucket.com/albums/v313/Gravekeeper/Miscellaneous%20Sketches/MLPQuickSketch-WarRity-MissSpelling-HollyDiver.pngEnjoy!
Wow, I am so SLOW! Even after reading all 5 chapters in a row, I didn't pick up on the name-puns until reading these comments. I feel ashamed, they were so obvious, and I'm a huge Dio fan, Holy Diver even came up on shuffle while I was reading chapter 4.I can't wait for the rest ^_^ great work.
I'm a little late to the party, but this story is all kinds of awesome, and as someone who just turned 21, I will be referring to alcohol as "Friendship Lubricant" at every available opportunity. Cool sketch too Gravekeeper, makes it easier for me to picture the characters.
@Gravekeeper That is exactly how I pictured all three of those characters, that is, not counting the cutie marks, that was anyone's guess, but as for features, yeah hit the nail right on the head for me =P Nice work haha. Medieval Rarity woo!!
I'm not sure if it was mentioned before and I missed it, but Fluttershy drank Big Mac under the table? Hilarious.Looking forward to the next chapter.
Right, this is my favourite fanfic I've read up until now. We need more comedy shipping fics! And more comedy fics in general.
[SPOILER], but…"Extra-Equestrials" That is massive amounts of awesome right there.
That was fast. This is some of the best fanfiction writing I've read.
Awesome an funny read! Personally, I think the AJ/Dash shipping is one too many in the story, but I can roll with it.But please, keep the other half of the main cast straight, for common sense sake!
That name replacement was absolutely terrible, and strangely, mildly amusing. She could have used "Twixie", though, but I really like how it's Twilight Sparkle on the title, not Trixie.I have to say, the most amusing part of this latest chapter is the cops part. I liked your New York pun, and I especially loved how you managed to condense several hours worth of chaos into such an amusing form. My favorite part would be Rarity's weapons finally getting their use, and Applejack just plain stampeding through everything and anything that was unfortunate enough to get in her way. I particularly loved that bit about the incompetent witnesses, too.So, Fluttershy won against Big Macintosh? Lovely.I'd love to see where Rafale and Applejack get to now that all the mane six plus Spike are in Manehatten.Thank you for writing this, and making it free, by the way.
That cops bit had me in stitches the whole time. 😀
I've been meaning to read this for several days now, and EsperDerek finally convinced me to sit down and do so last night. I couldn't stop, read all six chapters in one sitting and was left wanting MOAR!Also, Holly Diver reminds me of Mercy Graves from Superman for some reason…
my little inception moment:1.Watching this videohttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nPCSs6cFetc&feature=related2.Return to story and immediately read applejack saying "Dangit, dangit, dangit!"(about quarter way through)3. Squeal like a little girl and continue to play team fortress for the rest of the evening.I love this site.
I love this story, it's got my two favorite ships, plus it's well-written and funny… Yay!
@Anonymous>But please, keep the other half of the main cast straightEh, what'cha gonna do.Fluttershy and Big Mac would make a really cute pair, Rarity's gotta be straight (certain fanfics aside), and Pinkie… is just Pinkie. I can't decide if she's just asexual or more "anything that moves", but I just can't see her in a stable relationship.
Haha oh Celestia, the entourage line was so hilarious. RD seems a bit out of character reading contracts, but I love how she played off the mane six as various employees for Twilight.
I have been waiting for this for days. I am glad it did not disappoint. I am also glad it seems we still have more chapter(s?) to go ^^
I'm pissing myself in laughter over the opening for this latest chapter! 😀
Oh Celestia this story is AMAZING! Need MOAR right now!
Dash should totally be a real lawyer xD
I'm amazed and very much amused at Rarity's rather fashionable style of beating up over 20 colts and mares who are supposedly more powerful than her. The way she styled and primed every single one of them while beating the ever living daylights out of them was hilarious, and strangely, illogical, and very much in character. I particularly liked the mention of some of the more gifted guards having their own solar winds blowing through their hair.Her insulting the officer's taste in fashion was lovely, especially with how Rarity the entire thing tasted like.I'm glad to finally see the poster of this Ballad. It's interesting, with the tagline, and I laughed a little when AJ went derp because of the confusion.It was an interesting thing when you said that the movie's only being edited at this point. I'd love to see what Trixie did to make-up for the lack of actual Twilight, and would you kindly show the hell that was casting?Rafale's contract was appropriately sinister. Her being terrified of the sheer amount of muscles Applejack had was brilliant. I love the flexing part; it's strangely sexy for the pony I'm normally uninterested.The parking issue in Manehattan was hilarious. Strangely, it wasn't funny because they actually managed to find hot air balloon parking, but that the rates are as hilariously expensive as they are here. Personally, I've never actually paid for parking (Public Transport Buff, I am), but I can still feel the pain with the parking fees, which I'm sure are going to become very exorbitant in just a couple of hours. Oh, I await the hour they come back to the balloon…The analogy of fashion runway models in a mosh pit was bloody brilliant. I don't know where you came up with this, but I am so using this in my fics if ever Rarity fights someone, simply because it was so awesome. Thank you.The Fluttershy on the Runway event was oddly appropriate. I love how you brought it back up, in one of the most fitting situations I have never really thought of. Once again, the bit about the self-powered solar wind was hilarious.Rainbow Dash's excuses, quick thinking, and legal sights are brilliant, and oddly appropriate. It's honestly mind blowing for me that Dash can see so many hang-ups and traps, and deal with them in such an amusing manner with drawings and very simple language. Please, put her in a court.The mention of reasonably wealthy newsponies made me laugh. The return of Holly Diver, as the person to determine HOW incriminating the photos are were amusing.The Stare was appropriately intense. I love the feeling of "OH GOD I CAN SEE FOREVER!" Trixie got with Fluttershy, and Fluttershy's apologies when The Stare broke was appropriate and cute.The cake and punch was lovely, and very show like. Quite like Pinkie Pie to have baked a cake then delivered it all the way to Manehattan along with some fruit punch.I look forward to the next one, especially with how this whole "sappy stuff" will play out. Kind of reminds me of my first draft of New Moon Rising.
Oh my gosh this is one of the best stories ever, and with the pictures to accompany it it just skyrockets into famous-ness.
story is absolute lunacy to the highest degree.
I have to say, the idea of Rainbow Dash having some kind of scary secret competence at reading legalese is brilliant, because it manages to be pure insanity and oddly in-character at the same time. When I saw the line "← Totally not cool- FIX IT!'" and the description of how it was written, I basically laughed until I couldn't breath anymore.One other gem included Rarity waiving her right to remain silent and basically chewing out the officers for their dress code. "Best. Perp. Ever!" indeed.Another favorite part was when Fluttershy tried to use The Stare on Trixie and grabbed everyone in the room on accident. I had to get up an walk around to stop laughing at that point.Can't wait for the next chapter.
GOD I LOVE THIS FANFIC! hahaha, really there is no better way to say it, this is the first and probably only fanfic that I will check EQD each day just to see if anything new is posted. You have a brilliant way of depicting the characters, and keeping them in tune with the real ones when they speak, I look forward to seeing Twilights reaction when she wakes up in the meeting room to see all of her friends there xD
>… an endless meadow, thousands of swords stuck into the soil at random angles …Unlimited Blade Works reference? Yay.
That was NOT a song I expected to see coming out of Pinkie. I have to try and imagine "Paint it Black" in a major key, now.
Rainbow Dash, Action Lawyer!Miss Rarity, Combat Stylist!WHAT HAVE YOU DONESeriously, if you had walked up to me and said you were going to have Dash play lawyer, I'd have asked what you were smoking — but somehow, it works. I was going to say that she's got a pretty good sense for social dynamics, but it occurred to me that it's actually sort of like weather work. She can't see the air moving, but lots of little clues together show the flow of things — whether that's a cold front from the north, or bullies using pressure tactics and legal BS.
P.S. Feel free to crib that comparison if you want to. 🙂
Why was I as giddy as a schoolgirl the entire time I was reading this!?MAYBE BECAUSE IT WAS AMAZING.
>But please, keep the other half of the main cast straight, for common sense sake! I wasn't gonna add any other pairings, but now you're just *asking* for me to kick reason to the curb!@SilverspotI hadn't been intending on that comparison, but now I will never be able to get it out of my head. Twilight as Brainiac, maybe?@zanzibarYes, the Engie reference was fully intentional (does EqD have a SteamGroup?) Applejack bucks practical problems, not problems like, "What is Friendship?"- – -Again, reading everyone's comments only makes my… keyboard… harder! Though I know how the story ends, the journey getting there keeps evolving; confound these ponies for being so fun to write about! ruff1298, your reviews are always a special highlight when I'm scanning through this section- thank you, and thanks to everyone here for taking the time to read my story and comment- and a special thanks for all the bronies that hang with me at the Googledocs chat whenever I'm around!
The last scene in Part 8 was great. Fluttershy was what, on her 15th, 16th shot? And that jab with Pinkie's bow-tie was hilarious.
This story is great ^^
So, now Rainbow Dash has to be a lawyer for Rarity while still drunk? I look forward to seeing this.Great exposition with the security incident. I really liked how Rarity was being a lady and the security guards were being a couple of bored and rookie asses (no offence to any mules reading this comment). I particularly liked how Daze was getting less and less impressive as the situation turned more and more into a major lawsuit that would they would lose, very, very quickly.I loved how Trixie was giddy to have friends, and was only partially broken by the Stare. It's lovely to see her being treated with the same amount of Love and Tolerance the other ponies do with each other. I particularly loved it when you mentioned that she was giddy at the concept of a sleepover.Pinkie Pie the Bartender, though already used and definitely a classic, was brilliant. I love it whenever Pinkie Pie is portrayed as the mistress of anything involving a party, whether it be planning or Friendship Lubricant (thank you very much for bringing it up again).The bits wherein the other ponies, drunk (especially Fluttershy and her oddly appropriate experience with flaming shots) and amused teased Trixie about her bedroom and Twilight being there with her was hilarious. Fluttershy being the first to break was brilliant.If you may be so kind, could you have Gilda as the bailiff when court actually arrives? You could have some quip about "it was this or Day Care!" plus her saying something about her cool Electro-Rifle followed by an extremely downtrodden explanation of how she has only used it twice, both during a test firing.
lol this is well done mman
Oh yeah. More Friendship Lubricant.ilikewherethisisgoing.jpg
Spectacular next chapter. Can't wait for more.
I require more clop please.
Oooh, sweet Celestia I love this story. The latest chapter was brilliant.Holly Diver and Miss Spelling are SO a couple. XDI wish Hasbro would actually release a Warrior Princess version of Rarity. :DI really have to wonder if Dash has actually passed the bar, and just took the weather officer job because law was too boring. Incidentally, I'm guessing by the "Rainbow Dash the Second" line that her mother was G3.5 Rainbow Dash? I could kinda see her as a lawyer, in a "Legally Blonde" kinda way….Also, Dash's Austin Powers moment when Trixie said to put Twilight in her bed was priceless. XDGlad you liked the Holly Diver-Mercy Graves comparison!
On second thought, I bet Dash's legal "knowledge" comes entirely from playing Ace Attorney games and watching old episodes of Matlock (or would the ponified version be called "Fetlock"? ^^).
Very funny, I do like this story, but…… is everypony gay? Really? ALL of them?
Like many others, I am quite impressed with your lively writing style,sense of humor,timing,puns, and reference's. I Cannot wait for chapter 9!
I have to say, I'm very impressed with this fic. It has impeccable grammar (except for one minor thing that may only bother me), superb spelling, and you captured the characters so well it was like reading the script to an adult version of the show.What made me happiest though is that you don't just tell us straight away, "THIS CHARACTER IS IN LOVE WITH THIS ONE NOW YOU WILL ADORE THIS PAIRING!!11111!!!2!" unlike most slash authors. You give hints to how each character is feeling about the other characters. While you did make it pretty obvious that Twilight Sparkle and Trixie will end up together (or it wouldn't be a slash fic, damnit!) you don't do it in a way that shoves us muzzle-first into it.The humour and references made my night. I actually feel better about doing 36 maths problems now. Thanks. Also you helped me forget cupcakes which I just read, so that's nice.In other words, TYPE FASTER, DAMNIT. FASTERRRRRRRR.
I can't believe how much I enjoyed reading this fic. The lake minnetrotka was a Chappelle reference that had me dying laughing. Absolutely brilliant, I can't wait for the next chapter.
Super funny and adorable! Made me stay up WAY past my bedtime! Wait… that's not such a good thing… I'm not going to be very fun tomorrow…
Hmmm. upon reviewing the latest installment Moar Boar can safely say that he would indeed still like some moar.
I think this is one of the best things I've ever read. And thanks to whoever did the illustrations (assuming the author?), those things really help! =D
That is totally what Trixie meant.
Oh holy cheeziness this is good. Chapter after chapter after chapter you nearly make me fall from my chair from the sheer force of laughter.I like how the pairings are subtle jabs rather than the aforementioned "these suddenly love eachother and you must like it nao"-style we see so much in clopfics. Keep 'em subtle ;)I like how Applejack was confused at the end, it certainly is fitting.Actually, in generally I approve of just how well you keep the mane cast in-character throughout this."…Worth it." I concur.
Let me add my voice to the chorus of "I love how you handle shipping." Sometimes subtle and sometimes overt. I mean of COURSE twi can't play it cool…. and Dash meeting AJ at last made me d'awww.How the heck did you make me care how Holly/Speling turns out? I shouldn't care about OC pony shipping!Speaking of, though, I can't wait for Miss Spelling to meet Applejack face to face. I have a feeling she's going to immediately decide that "caterer" is code language for "bodyguard".Dash works really well as what TVtropes would call a Bunny Ears Lawyer. I was trying to xplain this story to somebody else and their reaction made me say, "Actually that IS kind of weird, why did I accept Dashie as a competant lawyer so fast?" Testament to good writing I guess… maybe Dash's mom didn't like the sports thing as a primary carer and forced Dash to take classes for legal? Or maybe she studied contract law in hopes that she would need the skill once she makes Wonderbolt?To an above commenter, I note that you only need to have passed the bar to be a rep in a court. For contract negotiations there is no actual requirement to have proved your credentials. And anyway I have no idea if Equestria even requires a bar exam.
@EscherI do believe Rainbow would be succesfull in any bar exam.In that she takes Pinkie and Fluttershy over to the next bar and tests it. Repeatedly.
@AnonymousBa-dum tisssh
@EscherThank you, thank you.
I'm glad you're all liking so far :DI hadn't meant for the latest chapter to focus on Diver and Spelling, I was just having too much fun writing their exchange and then boom, suddenly they took up most of the chapter.@AnonymousIt's partly for the lulz :D@AnonymousThere should be a show based solely on Charlie Murphy's stories, man@KujiiroYup, the sketches below the story description are all mine, I whipped them up while chatting with the readers via googledocs; in fact, here, I just traced and did a quick coloring of the billboard.http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v313/Gravekeeper/Miscellaneous%20Art/MLPQuickie-TBaBGDBillboardColor.png
When I started reading it last night, I ended up disappointed. But that was just because I had to stop mid-chapter because I was falling asleep in front of the computer. Now that I'm caught up, I can definitely join the chorus for MOAR.Also, you have single-handedly convinced me not to outright reject shipping. Yes, I was incredibly skeptical at first, but this is just… Great. Adorable. Hilarious. Confusing.You, sir, win 40 Internets.
I have to say that I've really enjoyed this story so far. I sat down and started reading this maybe an hour or so before Chapter 8 posted and, hadn't read the comments yet. Imagine my surprise when I get to the most recent chapter and not only is the writer of what has just become one of my favorite FiM fan fictions is in the discussion, but polite and fun to chat with. I've bookmarked the page and, I will be checking back regularly for updates. Now I'm off to reread this lovely fan fiction to see if I catch anything that I may have missed the first time through.
BY CELESTIA . . . damn . . . you guys are making me like Trixie now too . . . . what has the brony collective done >.< ANYWHOOOOOOOOOOOOO I absolutely ADORE this story, i didnt think i would like this . . . . specially since its a twixie tale. But i was like . . . Twilight is my favorite right .. . . this one has 8 chapter . . . and it has comedy. THANK YOU!!! definately made my day!! I read two chapter yesterday and the rest today and i LAUGHED all the way thru them. My favorite like was 'Oh Celestia, I cant beleive i cast all over Trixie's face like that!' At first i was like OMWTFBBQ . . .then i smirked . . . then said smirk turned into a Pinkie Pie grin . . . then an Applejack hur . . . then it turned into a full 20% cooler than normal Dashie cackle. I was laughing soo hard that everypony at the gas station was looking at me ( yes i was reading this while i was working ( love smartphones ) I almost fell over i was laughing soo hard. I had to stop work to calm down . . . . . .
holly diver! You've been out too long in the court room case!
Sorry Chapter 9 took so long, guys- my entire weekend was done for the moment a couple of friends dropped by to stay over from Friday to Sunday! No time to write whatsoever >.>@Anonymous*Redeems them for a one of those sticky, stretchy hand things*@ChaseThanks for the kind words- chatting with the readers is great fun, I love this fandom :D@Doc SteedlyJoin the Twixie Overwatch. Do not resist the assimilation.@Brett TurnerDammit, now I won't be able to get the song out of my head…
This fic never fails to create laughs! 😀
There cannot be enough ways to say how brilliant this fic is.
"Who you callin' a Lady?"http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XZxzJGgox_E0:00 – AJ0:01 – 'Pie, Trix, Flutter, Guard0:02 – NxBronies
It's a shame Trixie and Twilight are watching action movies and not… getting it on.
That last line killed me!!
Lol…This fanfic is great… I can't wait for more >w<
Oh goodie. The latest chaoter was, again, brilliant. I can so imagine 'Dash being a shade of purple after certain "yay" – which by the way was an awesome way for them to "get caught" xDThe last line was a killer. Again.
Yay, new chapter!D'awwwwww, aren't Dashie and AJ so cute together?'Yay!' :D'Trixie's… friends? YES!' :D'Good morning, Twilight Sparkle…' <3Awww, over already?Another incredible chapter in one of my fave fics! Can't wait for the next!
Yay, new chapter!D'awwwwww, aren't Dashie and AJ so cute together?'Yay!' :D'Trixie's… friends? YES!' :D'Good morning, Twilight Sparkle…' <3Awww, over already?Another incredible chapter in one of my fave fics! Can't wait for the next!
Yay~ This is by far my favorite fan-fic on this site, I also met an AWESOME friend over the chat while reading this chapter. With that I am able to confidently say this is by far my favorite fan-fic.
Yay~ This is by far my favorite fan-fic on this site, I also met an AWESOME friend over the chat while reading this chapter. With that I am able to confidently say this is by far my favorite fan-fic.
Chapter 9 ended epically. Seriously, the possibilities…
I'm not one for shipping and same sex relationships but man you know how to write a story. Dash's Showdown with miss Spelling had me Rollinng in laughter keep up the good work
>"Who you callin' a lady, chump?" I'd like to point out that Dash has never shown a specific objection to effeminacy like AJ does. She doesn't go out of her way to act ladylike and has no patience for getting dolled up, but as long as she looks cool she doesn't seem to mind showing her feminine side.
I'm gonna make the joke. I'm gonna make it. Pinkie Spy.Seriously. This is good stuff.
>Chapter 8: Missy and Holly Wait, you mean "Miss" is part of her name??
I almost died laughing at Pinkie Fisher.
Oh, geeeez. I'm really dense.In Cutie Mark Chronicles, Li'l AJ followed a rainbow home from Manehattan. Now she's back in the big city, still following a rainbow… and they're both the same Rainbow.I just got that.Very nice, Graves. Subtle cuteness.
Always an epic new chapter. Looking forward to the next one, like always. Thanks to the author and to God.
Splinter Pie-Shipping Theory!epic Pinkie in this Chapter.
*Insert lazy pun about Applejack 'tasting the rainbow' here*In all seriousness, this was a cute and silly little chapter. Pinkie's antics are just over the top enough to be hilarious, but not so much that you push the boundaries of her character. It's tough for Pinkie Pie to act too weird, I know, but I'm sure it can be done.
I fully expected Pinkie to chloroform the guard,not hug him.Something tells me "SGT"Fluttershy has done the spy thing with Pinkie before.I love this fic.The comedy is amazingly funny,and the plot is great.I think I woke up my entire street last night with my laughs.Massive kudos to you.
I fully expected Pinkie to chloroform the guard,not hug him.Something tells me "SGT"Fluttershy has done the spy thing with Pinkie before.I love this fic.The comedy is amazingly funny,and the plot is great.I think I woke up my entire street last night with my laughs.Massive kudos to you.
Gravekeeper, thank you for writing this!I was in a particularly bad mood recently due to issues outside of my control and I was just feeling… horrendously bleh. And you know what I did to cheer myself up? I said to myself, "You know, I should finish reading that Ballad of Twilight story up to the most recent chapter." And it worked wonderfully! I smiled and laughed and wanted to pet ponies. Oh, and watch blushing ponies. And then hug blushing ponies. Dawwww…Ahem. Anyway. I love this story. It's like… refined pony sugar. ❤
http://stabicon.deviantart.com/gallery/#/d3iboz3Fanart for this story~
^That looks a lot more badass than I had imagined.Huh, two out of my three favorite ongoing fics (this one and It's A Dangerous Business) recently involved Rarity wearing a blade on her horn. Coincidence?
I'm not sure, but did I just get rick-rolled buy a drunken Twilight?
No, Pinkie, pony's eyes don't work like the T-Rex from Jurassic Park.And Pinkie Fisher? Classic.
@LordOfTheWrongsMaybe RD wants to be the stallion in the relationship?@EscherThat was damned observant, bro!@CupcakesNomI'm glad I was able to cheer you up! *Comedy4Lyfe*@AnonymousSo, that is totally getting faved next time I log into DA- this is great! See? Fashion revolution.@AnonymousEvery time Dangerous Business has a chapter out, I have to stop whatever it is I'm doing to read it, or I can't go on with my day.@TenchiFreak5Ponies = 3-foot-tall turkeys
@LordOfTheWrongsMaybe RD wants to be the stallion in the relationship?@EscherThat was damned observant, bro!@CupcakesNomI'm glad I was able to cheer you up! *Comedy4Lyfe*@AnonymousSo, that is totally getting faved next time I log into DA- this is great! See? Fashion revolution.@AnonymousEvery time Dangerous Business has a chapter out, I have to stop whatever it is I'm doing to read it, or I can't go on with my day.@TenchiFreak5Ponies = 3-foot-tall turkeys
There was an entry in one of the recent drawfriend stuff that looked like it was based on rarity in this but no one really seemed to comment on it and it hasnt been linked in this so i just thought I;d show it to you guys;3http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-TlkUAHqGGvg/TfAWLZqZABI/AAAAAAAAFp8/m2YflbyKAlw/s1600/WQwQj.pngdidn't have a sauce
There was an entry in one of the recent drawfriend stuff that looked like it was based on rarity in this but no one really seemed to comment on it and it hasnt been linked in this so i just thought I;d show it to you guys;3http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-TlkUAHqGGvg/TfAWLZqZABI/AAAAAAAAFp8/m2YflbyKAlw/s1600/WQwQj.pngdidn't have a sauce
cuddly projectiles?… awesome
cuddly projectiles?… awesome
Great! A new update… How am I supposed to go to sleep now? <.<;
Great! A new update… How am I supposed to go to sleep now? <.<;
WHY? WHY MUST DRUNK PONIES BE SO AWESOME?I have to admit that the chronological shift backwards in the latest chapter was a bit jarring for me. I felt like that probably could've been handled better, as I spent a lot of the early part of the chapter going, "Wait, wasn't it already the next morning?"Anyways, the comedy in this story is amazing. You write everypony so well!
WHY? WHY MUST DRUNK PONIES BE SO AWESOME?I have to admit that the chronological shift backwards in the latest chapter was a bit jarring for me. I felt like that probably could've been handled better, as I spent a lot of the early part of the chapter going, "Wait, wasn't it already the next morning?"Anyways, the comedy in this story is amazing. You write everypony so well!
It's five in the morn'.I just read chapters 9 & 10.Giggled at random statements because of that drunk feeling you have when you stay up all night.I feel successful.
It's five in the morn'.I just read chapters 9 & 10.Giggled at random statements because of that drunk feeling you have when you stay up all night.I feel successful.
YAY its gonna be a good day today. Got me a new chapter to read!
YAY its gonna be a good day today. Got me a new chapter to read!
Holy mother of pie this was awesome. Again.Why are drunk ponies so entertaining, anyway?You got me smiling(read: grinning like an idiot) through the whole thing.I guess it's too late to leave this particular ship anyway, so might as well enjoy it to its' fullest. Twixie. ❤
Holy mother of pie this was awesome. Again.Why are drunk ponies so entertaining, anyway?You got me smiling(read: grinning like an idiot) through the whole thing.I guess it's too late to leave this particular ship anyway, so might as well enjoy it to its' fullest. Twixie. ❤
"She hit them with batteries?! Man,your sister is almost as cool as Rainbow Dash!"And just like that, a sad day became so happy. Thank you.
"She hit them with batteries?! Man,your sister is almost as cool as Rainbow Dash!"And just like that, a sad day became so happy. Thank you.
My only real complaint is that this entire story appears to be taking place during an extended drunken bender. We're like two days in and there's been five different drinking sessions. I dunno about you, but if the pre-story party was as soused as it sounds, I would have NO interest in drinking for at least a couple days after.
My only real complaint is that this entire story appears to be taking place during an extended drunken bender. We're like two days in and there's been five different drinking sessions. I dunno about you, but if the pre-story party was as soused as it sounds, I would have NO interest in drinking for at least a couple days after.
@Escher"My only real complaint is that this entire story appears to be taking place during an extended drunken bender."You say that like it's a bad thing.
@Escher"My only real complaint is that this entire story appears to be taking place during an extended drunken bender."You say that like it's a bad thing.
ERGH YES!Another chapter :DGod this is amazing ❤
ERGH YES!Another chapter :DGod this is amazing ❤
DEAR SWEET GODS OF THE INTERNET WHY IS THIS SO AMAZING?!
DEAR SWEET GODS OF THE INTERNET WHY IS THIS SO AMAZING?!
I wonder what Sethisto thinks of this story so far :3
I wonder what Sethisto thinks of this story so far :3
This story is awesome. And I have to agree with everyone here; drunken ponies are amusing.Finished Chap. 9, very adoring moment with RD and AJ. Had a few laughs when they discovered they were being spied on. Will go for 10 later.
This story is awesome. And I have to agree with everyone here; drunken ponies are amusing.Finished Chap. 9, very adoring moment with RD and AJ. Had a few laughs when they discovered they were being spied on. Will go for 10 later.
I was laughing all the way through this chapter (as is normal), but when Twilight made the pancakes explode for some reason I almost fell out of my chair.
I was laughing all the way through this chapter (as is normal), but when Twilight made the pancakes explode for some reason I almost fell out of my chair.
HAH im still loving this, each chapter is being looked foreward to like a holiday . . . or a long vacation to me. I eagerly await each peice, this story is soo funny and great and YAY. I hope its got alot, more but then again dont work too hard author. Your doing perfectly!
HAH im still loving this, each chapter is being looked foreward to like a holiday . . . or a long vacation to me. I eagerly await each peice, this story is soo funny and great and YAY. I hope its got alot, more but then again dont work too hard author. Your doing perfectly!
@Gravekeeper>That was damned observant, bro!In other words, "Wow, I wasn't even thinking of that when I wrote it," right? -:D>Every time Dangerous Business has a chapter out, I have to stop whatever it is I'm doing to read it, or I can't go on with my day.I know that feel, bro. Same goes for this one, actually…
@Gravekeeper>That was damned observant, bro!In other words, "Wow, I wasn't even thinking of that when I wrote it," right? -:D>Every time Dangerous Business has a chapter out, I have to stop whatever it is I'm doing to read it, or I can't go on with my day.I know that feel, bro. Same goes for this one, actually…
Drunk ponies are always funny — especially Twilight, who's usually on the uptight side and is therefore absolutely hilarious when her guard is down.Then you throw in Trixie, whose powers of self-deception are greater than every Cubs fan in Chicago put together.
Drunk ponies are always funny — especially Twilight, who's usually on the uptight side and is therefore absolutely hilarious when her guard is down.Then you throw in Trixie, whose powers of self-deception are greater than every Cubs fan in Chicago put together.
@alasdairYour mission is to find this drawfriend and get him/her/it to show their face here so that we may prematurely cast appreciation all over it :D@EscherTechnically, the last two were the same bender, it was just interrupted briefly by AJ and Dash. And the pre-story one was actually worse than all the next ones by a few orders of magnitude!@LordOfTheWrongsExactly. Don't tell anyone though! And thanks for the kind words :D@LordOfTheWrongsOuch! What did the Cubs ever do to you, other than fail for a century?
@alasdairYour mission is to find this drawfriend and get him/her/it to show their face here so that we may prematurely cast appreciation all over it :D@EscherTechnically, the last two were the same bender, it was just interrupted briefly by AJ and Dash. And the pre-story one was actually worse than all the next ones by a few orders of magnitude!@LordOfTheWrongsExactly. Don't tell anyone though! And thanks for the kind words :D@LordOfTheWrongsOuch! What did the Cubs ever do to you, other than fail for a century?
OMG!THIS IS AWESOME!
OMG!THIS IS AWESOME!
If any pony fanfic needs converting into a movie, its this one yo. I LOVE IT SO MUCH!
If any pony fanfic needs converting into a movie, its this one yo. I LOVE IT SO MUCH!
WOW!!!! Keep writing. This is a great story so far.
WOW!!!! Keep writing. This is a great story so far.
@GravekeeperLOL, nothing — I live thousands of miles from Chicago. They're just the team with the stereotypical reality-defying fans.
@GravekeeperLOL, nothing — I live thousands of miles from Chicago. They're just the team with the stereotypical reality-defying fans.
Just read part 11, it was fantastic. (Just like the rest of the story.)Can't wait for part 12! 😀
Just read part 11, it was fantastic. (Just like the rest of the story.)Can't wait for part 12! 😀
NOM.More please. :)I love your characterizations of Twilight and Trixie's relationship. Absolutely hilaricute.
NOM.More please. :)I love your characterizations of Twilight and Trixie's relationship. Absolutely hilaricute.
This makes it official: I want Rainbow Dash as my lawyer. Also, Twilight is absolutely adorable when she acts all freaked out about liking Trixie.
This makes it official: I want Rainbow Dash as my lawyer. Also, Twilight is absolutely adorable when she acts all freaked out about liking Trixie.
This is brilliant. The antics are hilarious and seem to fit all the characters perfectly.
This is brilliant. The antics are hilarious and seem to fit all the characters perfectly.
"If Rainbow Dash were to smile any wider, she would need more face."I love this phrase. XD
"If Rainbow Dash were to smile any wider, she would need more face."I love this phrase. XD
So THAT'S why Rainbow Dash is a legal mastermind….
So THAT'S why Rainbow Dash is a legal mastermind….
GFEEERRG YES!Another part!I love it already ❤
GFEEERRG YES!Another part!I love it already ❤
@DJ KatI too wondered about that as well. I mean, RD a legal professional? I didn't even know she had that kind of skill. And the ending pretty much explains everything.Anyways, great chapter. Twilight is just cute when she's tensed around Trixie.
@DJ KatI too wondered about that as well. I mean, RD a legal professional? I didn't even know she had that kind of skill. And the ending pretty much explains everything.Anyways, great chapter. Twilight is just cute when she's tensed around Trixie.
@GravekeeperOn your request, our benevolent leader and author ^^, I looked up the artist and drawfriend etcThe drawfriend was number 100 (link below) and the entry was #54, the artist's name was Urshilikai.http://www.equestriadaily.com/2011/06/drawfriend-stuff-100.htmlI ALSO found his deviantart account, but I see you beat me to it :P, here's the link anywayhttp://urshilikai.deviantart.com/art/Bladed-Rarity-212182952?q=gallery%3Aurshilikai%2F17709505&qo=4and there you go, think that's everything. credit him as you see fit :)Lovin the work so far Gravekeeper keep it up :Dthis is easily becoming one of my favourite fics on the site
@GravekeeperOn your request, our benevolent leader and author ^^, I looked up the artist and drawfriend etcThe drawfriend was number 100 (link below) and the entry was #54, the artist's name was Urshilikai.http://www.equestriadaily.com/2011/06/drawfriend-stuff-100.htmlI ALSO found his deviantart account, but I see you beat me to it :P, here's the link anywayhttp://urshilikai.deviantart.com/art/Bladed-Rarity-212182952?q=gallery%3Aurshilikai%2F17709505&qo=4and there you go, think that's everything. credit him as you see fit :)Lovin the work so far Gravekeeper keep it up :Dthis is easily becoming one of my favourite fics on the site
Learning the law the hard way XD…or is it the easy way, I've heard law school is a bitch…Gawd, I almost SQUEED in my office when I saw this was update.
Learning the law the hard way XD…or is it the easy way, I've heard law school is a bitch…Gawd, I almost SQUEED in my office when I saw this was update.
Only 5.5 from the Russian judge?! Boo! Boo! "If you ladies are done comparing the size of your brushes with death…" I have a new euphemism! 😀
Only 5.5 from the Russian judge?! Boo! Boo! "If you ladies are done comparing the size of your brushes with death…" I have a new euphemism! 😀
Supa cool story bro!
Supa cool story bro!
“Oh dude, are you part of an underground rodeo club that meets every week just to duke it out because you all feel disenfranchised and alienated by society?”Ok, apparently Dash reads Buck Palahniuk.Sorry, couldn't help my self.
“Oh dude, are you part of an underground rodeo club that meets every week just to duke it out because you all feel disenfranchised and alienated by society?”Ok, apparently Dash reads Buck Palahniuk.Sorry, couldn't help my self.
This chapter had everything. Movie references! A callback to one of my favorite jokes from Chapter 6! A perfect explanation for Dash's legal prowess!Fantastic.
This chapter had everything. Movie references! A callback to one of my favorite jokes from Chapter 6! A perfect explanation for Dash's legal prowess!Fantastic.
@PhroexxTyler Herden?
@PhroexxTyler Herden?
Wow, this is like the smartest-written fanfic I've read so far, genuinely had some moments where I laughed at it.Roll on chapter 12 please!
Wow, this is like the smartest-written fanfic I've read so far, genuinely had some moments where I laughed at it.Roll on chapter 12 please!
That pic of Rarity! All I can say is, this is not madness! THIS IS FASHION!
That pic of Rarity! All I can say is, this is not madness! THIS IS FASHION!
Kept seeing this pop up to the top of ED whenever it updated, and eventually my curiosity was piqued so I read it. Part 1 was kinda funny, so I kept reading. Part 2, 3, and 4 all entertained me as well. But by the line "objection" in part 5, I was having trouble staying seated, I was laughing so hard. One of the best fanfics, period.
Kept seeing this pop up to the top of ED whenever it updated, and eventually my curiosity was piqued so I read it. Part 1 was kinda funny, so I kept reading. Part 2, 3, and 4 all entertained me as well. But by the line "objection" in part 5, I was having trouble staying seated, I was laughing so hard. One of the best fanfics, period.
*snickers* I really enjoy some of your characterizations. Smart Dash is Smart. 😀
*snickers* I really enjoy some of your characterizations. Smart Dash is Smart. 😀
Double rainbow joke AND the end is neigh joke? This continues to impress me.
Double rainbow joke AND the end is neigh joke? This continues to impress me.
Okay I have to say one thing.This is getting ridiculous! I've been wanting to read this since it was at part 5, but I don't read unfinished stories, so I've had to wait and wait until you finally finish it, but I keep seeing updates!When will it be done? How many parts are you shooting for?
Okay I have to say one thing.This is getting ridiculous! I've been wanting to read this since it was at part 5, but I don't read unfinished stories, so I've had to wait and wait until you finally finish it, but I keep seeing updates!When will it be done? How many parts are you shooting for?
YESYESYESYESYERSYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYES ANOTHER UPDATE!And guy above me, you need to read it as it goes, it's so good. SO GOOD.
YESYESYESYESYERSYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYES ANOTHER UPDATE!And guy above me, you need to read it as it goes, it's so good. SO GOOD.
A new chapter of Ballad right as I get off work?This will be a good commute home.
A new chapter of Ballad right as I get off work?This will be a good commute home.
Please tell me Rarity will be armed to the teeth again by the time she runs into Trixie, badass!Rarity is the main reason I read this fic. Oh, and the next time she lays the smackdown (she will, right?) please don't offscreen it!Trixie's just fine, but I want to read more about the Gallant and Heroic Rarity!
Please tell me Rarity will be armed to the teeth again by the time she runs into Trixie, badass!Rarity is the main reason I read this fic. Oh, and the next time she lays the smackdown (she will, right?) please don't offscreen it!Trixie's just fine, but I want to read more about the Gallant and Heroic Rarity!
I hope I'm not the only one who thought of the "I Can Count To Apple" reaction pic while reading this chapter.
I hope I'm not the only one who thought of the "I Can Count To Apple" reaction pic while reading this chapter.
Twixie is the greatest non Rainbow Dash shipbest Twixie shipping story ever !!!
Twixie is the greatest non Rainbow Dash shipbest Twixie shipping story ever !!!
Just to nitpick, I still don't think the drawings of the halberd are quite right;http://www.nps.gov/museum/exhibits/revwar/image_gal/morrimg/halberd.htmlSee, the attachment should go around the horn like a sleive…
Just to nitpick, I still don't think the drawings of the halberd are quite right;http://www.nps.gov/museum/exhibits/revwar/image_gal/morrimg/halberd.htmlSee, the attachment should go around the horn like a sleive…
wow Twilight really makes a hilarious drunk in this XD
wow Twilight really makes a hilarious drunk in this XD
Oh man, sorry for the wait, guys, and as always, thanks for all the comments- had a good laugh at the lame Fight Club puns… I should use them :DI've got a bit of a poll to make:1. Missy & Holly's back story and how they came to be involved in the movie2. Trixie's months of disappearance before The Ballad3. An RD story that takes place after The BalladI've got the framework for any of these stories already, which one would you guys want to see after The Ballad concludes?@AnonymousThough it hasn't been included in the blog post, if you look at my May 25th comment, you'll see I made a sketch of Rarity in full regalia–http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v313/Gravekeeper/Miscellaneous%20Sketches/MLPQuickSketch-WarRity-MissSpelling-HollyDiver.pngSo that's the canon look right there–but hey, I ❤ fanart, so I like the interpretations that the bronies came up with… Rarity should ALWAYS be wearing a cape.
Oh man, sorry for the wait, guys, and as always, thanks for all the comments- had a good laugh at the lame Fight Club puns… I should use them :DI've got a bit of a poll to make:1. Missy & Holly's back story and how they came to be involved in the movie2. Trixie's months of disappearance before The Ballad3. An RD story that takes place after The BalladI've got the framework for any of these stories already, which one would you guys want to see after The Ballad concludes?@AnonymousThough it hasn't been included in the blog post, if you look at my May 25th comment, you'll see I made a sketch of Rarity in full regalia–http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v313/Gravekeeper/Miscellaneous%20Sketches/MLPQuickSketch-WarRity-MissSpelling-HollyDiver.pngSo that's the canon look right there–but hey, I ❤ fanart, so I like the interpretations that the bronies came up with… Rarity should ALWAYS be wearing a cape.
I just finished reading 1-12, and I feel like /I'm/ drunk. This is what a romantic comedy should be, it's like I drank a giant bucket of random mixed with booze, and and then read The Guide.
I just finished reading 1-12, and I feel like /I'm/ drunk. This is what a romantic comedy should be, it's like I drank a giant bucket of random mixed with booze, and and then read The Guide.
@GravekeeperThat's a tough choice.2, then 3, then 1! ;D
@GravekeeperThat's a tough choice.2, then 3, then 1! ;D
@AnonymousYeah, well, those who haven't played D&D can't be expected to tell a glaive-guisarme from a ranseur.
@AnonymousYeah, well, those who haven't played D&D can't be expected to tell a glaive-guisarme from a ranseur.
This fic is getting even more awesome at each chapter.Dash backstory took me by surprise. I wanted to give her a hug but at the same time she seemed even more awesome by the way she got over it and started studying law.As for the poll, i'm not sure if i can vote in more than one, if i can i vote for 1 and 3, otherwise just 3.
This fic is getting even more awesome at each chapter.Dash backstory took me by surprise. I wanted to give her a hug but at the same time she seemed even more awesome by the way she got over it and started studying law.As for the poll, i'm not sure if i can vote in more than one, if i can i vote for 1 and 3, otherwise just 3.
lmao, that double rainbow bit was so full of win.
lmao, that double rainbow bit was so full of win.
I feel dirty for reading this '_'I like romancy stuff, and I like MLP: FiMbut the two together feels kinda taboo… but it's so good…/shame
I feel dirty for reading this '_'I like romancy stuff, and I like MLP: FiMbut the two together feels kinda taboo… but it's so good…/shame
@GravekeeperI vote 3. A Rainbow Dash: Ace Attorney series would be awesome.
@GravekeeperI vote 3. A Rainbow Dash: Ace Attorney series would be awesome.
@Anonymous(Adding on to my post)I also just happened to be listening to the "Double Rainbow" song as I got to the Double rainbow part.
@Anonymous(Adding on to my post)I also just happened to be listening to the "Double Rainbow" song as I got to the Double rainbow part.
@GravekeeperAnon 372 here (you remember me):Do number 3. The other two would be too closely related to the current story to sound like their own IP (so to speak), but the third has potential.
@GravekeeperAnon 372 here (you remember me):Do number 3. The other two would be too closely related to the current story to sound like their own IP (so to speak), but the third has potential.
Latest chapter was filled with hilariosity(it is a word now!). Again."The end is neigh" got me giggling for a good few minutes.As for the poll, I'd say #1(they are interesting characters, wanna know more), then #2 and #3.
Latest chapter was filled with hilariosity(it is a word now!). Again."The end is neigh" got me giggling for a good few minutes.As for the poll, I'd say #1(they are interesting characters, wanna know more), then #2 and #3.
Goshdang all these OC ponies are ruining what is otherwise an epic story.
Goshdang all these OC ponies are ruining what is otherwise an epic story.
I found your lack of Holly Diver in chapter 12 disturbing. And come on, where's chapter 13? It's felt like ages!Also judging by your chat on GDocs, I owe you some pistol-whipped Sentries Gravekeeper.
I found your lack of Holly Diver in chapter 12 disturbing. And come on, where's chapter 13? It's felt like ages!Also judging by your chat on GDocs, I owe you some pistol-whipped Sentries Gravekeeper.
So tired…Excellent work with setting up the joke for even more chaos and disaster to happen, all of it totally in character.I enjoyed your slow-down with the exposition on Rainbow Dash's legal abilities. I am not at all surprised that she managed to qualify for the Legal Bar Exam.The Double Rainbow (All the Way Across the Sky) reference was beautiful.Pinkie Pie's hilarious rambling about her bringing home numerous fillies (sometimes more than one at a single instance; something I find rather in character) was good for a chuckle. It may be my depleted energy reserves, or it may be the laugh break, but I didn't laugh so hard.Nice terminology with Twilight. I love the noun "Test Subject" for the hilarity it implies. What will this precipitate? I can't wait to see.Trixie being so vengeful was lovely. I would love to see the disaster you spin out of this.The Officers are going to have a hell of a time when Princess Celestia herself is involved. I love how you manage to spin together so much chaos in such orderly and logical fashion.
So tired…Excellent work with setting up the joke for even more chaos and disaster to happen, all of it totally in character.I enjoyed your slow-down with the exposition on Rainbow Dash's legal abilities. I am not at all surprised that she managed to qualify for the Legal Bar Exam.The Double Rainbow (All the Way Across the Sky) reference was beautiful.Pinkie Pie's hilarious rambling about her bringing home numerous fillies (sometimes more than one at a single instance; something I find rather in character) was good for a chuckle. It may be my depleted energy reserves, or it may be the laugh break, but I didn't laugh so hard.Nice terminology with Twilight. I love the noun "Test Subject" for the hilarity it implies. What will this precipitate? I can't wait to see.Trixie being so vengeful was lovely. I would love to see the disaster you spin out of this.The Officers are going to have a hell of a time when Princess Celestia herself is involved. I love how you manage to spin together so much chaos in such orderly and logical fashion.
@GravekeeperDouble Rainbow Dash! All the way!
@GravekeeperDouble Rainbow Dash! All the way!
>Rainbow Dash: Ace AttorneyOkay, if #3 is this, I wanna change my vote.
>Rainbow Dash: Ace AttorneyOkay, if #3 is this, I wanna change my vote.
This is really good. I'm not even much of a reader, but I read all 12 chapters of this in one night. Really can't wait for the next chapter.With that being said..MOAR!
This is really good. I'm not even much of a reader, but I read all 12 chapters of this in one night. Really can't wait for the next chapter.With that being said..MOAR!
To: GravekeeperThis is impressive.I have read a good amount of the fan fiction submissions, and for the most part, was not entertained by them. For the most part, the authors seemed to be lexicologically challenged, and their works lacked an aspect of realism, of humanity, or of comedy that would distinguish them from each other beyond their different plots.This on the other hand I find to be quite witty in nature, with excellent use of subtle references to external media and the smooth advanced writing style that was used, but wasn't overly emphasized. In general, the story has a steady pace; though not constant, it fluctuates very fluidly and therefore grants a very natural feel to the story.You have in fact made this a work of art. In a very literal sense of that statement. You have not delved into morality or rights and wrongs.The story has a feel that reminds me more than a little of The Picture of Dorian Gray (by Oscar Wilde).I am looking forward to the completion of this story.To summarize: Well done.
To: GravekeeperThis is impressive.I have read a good amount of the fan fiction submissions, and for the most part, was not entertained by them. For the most part, the authors seemed to be lexicologically challenged, and their works lacked an aspect of realism, of humanity, or of comedy that would distinguish them from each other beyond their different plots.This on the other hand I find to be quite witty in nature, with excellent use of subtle references to external media and the smooth advanced writing style that was used, but wasn't overly emphasized. In general, the story has a steady pace; though not constant, it fluctuates very fluidly and therefore grants a very natural feel to the story.You have in fact made this a work of art. In a very literal sense of that statement. You have not delved into morality or rights and wrongs.The story has a feel that reminds me more than a little of The Picture of Dorian Gray (by Oscar Wilde).I am looking forward to the completion of this story.To summarize: Well done.
Definitely #1.
Definitely #1.
So much awkwardness, I love it! 😀
So much awkwardness, I love it! 😀
Really great.Wonders how it's going to end.
Really great.Wonders how it's going to end.
some might not notice but the fact you stick to ALWAYS typing out her full proper title in all these chapters makes me giggle a bit at the tought."The Great and Powerful Trixie" always capitalizing the T, G, and P always, with obvious parts where it was missing was because she was in her not so The, or Great or Powerful self during times her title wasn't stated whenever her name was mentioned.Also Holly Diver is so BOSS xDAnd I must say you have done Rarity some amazing justice!I have too many one liners that frankly I love to death, but won't! Spent the last 2 nights enjoying these chapters and I'd hate to spoil any more awesome moments then have already been mentioned! xDAlso "Rainbow Dash: Attorney at Law!Bringing you Justice in 10 seconds flat with 20% more cool"P.S. God I love this series! I love The Great and Powerful Trixie and I love how well all these characters are played out! The OC characters Holly Diver and Miss Spelling are stellar to say the very least xDThis whole series has been so"..""…""…Worth it"http://i54.tinypic.com/98dpw2.jpgI hope you don't mind but i gave Holly a barely noticeable mold on her cheek, idk made her look more Boss imo ❤ never saw a description for her eyes and I suck at mouse art so didn't want to edit in fear I'd ruin the pick. Bad enough with what I did with Miss Spellings eyes 😛
some might not notice but the fact you stick to ALWAYS typing out her full proper title in all these chapters makes me giggle a bit at the tought."The Great and Powerful Trixie" always capitalizing the T, G, and P always, with obvious parts where it was missing was because she was in her not so The, or Great or Powerful self during times her title wasn't stated whenever her name was mentioned.Also Holly Diver is so BOSS xDAnd I must say you have done Rarity some amazing justice!I have too many one liners that frankly I love to death, but won't! Spent the last 2 nights enjoying these chapters and I'd hate to spoil any more awesome moments then have already been mentioned! xDAlso "Rainbow Dash: Attorney at Law!Bringing you Justice in 10 seconds flat with 20% more cool"P.S. God I love this series! I love The Great and Powerful Trixie and I love how well all these characters are played out! The OC characters Holly Diver and Miss Spelling are stellar to say the very least xDThis whole series has been so"..""…""…Worth it"http://i54.tinypic.com/98dpw2.jpgI hope you don't mind but i gave Holly a barely noticeable mold on her cheek, idk made her look more Boss imo ❤ never saw a description for her eyes and I suck at mouse art so didn't want to edit in fear I'd ruin the pick. Bad enough with what I did with Miss Spellings eyes 😛
I have too many one liners that frankly I love to death, but won't post so I don't spoil any of them to those who haven't read the story yet!/sadface.jpgI really do need to learn to use that preview button *does a sadface Applebloom impression*P.P.S. http://i54.tinypic.com/98dpw2.jpg I hope to see those two in maybe another Fic or even a cross over to Ace Attorney games. Almost sad to think such great OC characters will go bye bye once this story ends.
I have too many one liners that frankly I love to death, but won't post so I don't spoil any of them to those who haven't read the story yet!/sadface.jpgI really do need to learn to use that preview button *does a sadface Applebloom impression*P.P.S. http://i54.tinypic.com/98dpw2.jpg I hope to see those two in maybe another Fic or even a cross over to Ace Attorney games. Almost sad to think such great OC characters will go bye bye once this story ends.
I definitely want want Missy and Holly's back-story first. Thanks again!
I definitely want want Missy and Holly's back-story first. Thanks again!
I laughed so hard when Trixie said "THAT WAS NOT WHAT TRIXIE MEANT." lolThis has to be my favorite fanfiction I've read so far. It seems to just get better as it goes on. I need more…
I laughed so hard when Trixie said "THAT WAS NOT WHAT TRIXIE MEANT." lolThis has to be my favorite fanfiction I've read so far. It seems to just get better as it goes on. I need more…
This needs a subscribe button.
This needs a subscribe button.
This needs a button linked to a shock collar on Gravekeeper, so we can keep him working on Chaper 13. 😀
This needs a button linked to a shock collar on Gravekeeper, so we can keep him working on Chaper 13. 😀
@MihailKIt has one, if you have a Blogger account. Emails you whenever there's a new comment.Anyway, what's wrong with Seth's post updates?
@MihailKIt has one, if you have a Blogger account. Emails you whenever there's a new comment.Anyway, what's wrong with Seth's post updates?
@CoffeeGruntHe'd die within two minutes of the button's implementation.
@CoffeeGruntHe'd die within two minutes of the button's implementation.
I have a few things to say…Normally, I'm not a fan of romantic works, even the comedic ones. (Don't get me started on the serious ones)I also normally don't quite respect fanfics.You, sir, get a medal for defying both of my dislikes. At the same time.Only complaint is that I read it too fast.
I have a few things to say…Normally, I'm not a fan of romantic works, even the comedic ones. (Don't get me started on the serious ones)I also normally don't quite respect fanfics.You, sir, get a medal for defying both of my dislikes. At the same time.Only complaint is that I read it too fast.
this is very well written. i was sad to see that i already finished all the chapters and now i have to wait another month or 2 for the next ones.
this is very well written. i was sad to see that i already finished all the chapters and now i have to wait another month or 2 for the next ones.
If I count the Anon votes as well, the poll so far is:Missy & Holly: 3 votesTrixie's Travails: 1 vote (don't let Seth catch you Trixie-non-believers!)Rainbow Dash: 3 votesI don't want to raise any false hopes- full disclosure, my RD idea is not about her legal career. Trust me when I say I'm nowhere near smart enough to write courtoom dramedy.Oh snaps mass replies AAAAAHHHH@30eb973c-9d45-11e0-94a7-000bcdcb8a73I think you just described what a Pink Jagerbomb probably does to ponies.@AnonymousHahaha, I am glad I'm able to provide you with the pony filth that shames you to the core :D@AnonymousI blame the economy, really. Not enough cast ponies to pick up the slack, I had to start hiring outside the show.@CoffeeGruntShe'll be back soon enough- and yes, the delay in Chapter 13 is entirely because of Team Fortress 2- I haven't seen you at all online brah, I usually play on the Control Point Podcast CP1 server, my Steam is The_Gravekeeper@ruff1298Oh yes,sowing chaos and discord and watching the ponies react is one of the driving forces in my writing :D@AnonymousMan, my chapters are short, but that's still quite a bit of reading! It's like reading two or three chapters of Dangerous Business in one sitting o.o@AnonymousI'm humbled that you think so highly of my writing style–what began as a fun project at the expense of Twilight has really blossomed into a labor of love, and I'm overjoyed that you and all my readers have so much praise for it; I truly appreciate it, Anon@Anonymous@AnonymousHaha, someone's been paying attention! Did you notice the other little thing I did about her Great and Powerful name? That one is quite a bit more subtle >3I'm glad you're enjoying the OC characters, that was definitely one of the major things I thought people were gonna hate XDAs for the colors, you're pretty spot-on with the colors (I like the mole, too!), though Holly's cutie mark is green, since it's three holly leaves- and don't worry, I was actually gonna post a color guide for all five OCs after Chapter 13, then all will become clear!@LordOfTheWrongsHuh. I should've known that, probably. But I didn't. *facehoof*@CoffeeGrunt@AnonymousOh man, I think I totally spoiled everyone by writing the first 10 chapters one every 2-3 days… Suddenly a week between updates and I'm marked for death!@AnonymousI'm glad to have managed to spread some Love and Tolerance your way, my good Anon!@AnonymousAre you sure you're gonna have to wait a month or two? I'd give it a one-day wait. Two, tops. *Hint hint*
If I count the Anon votes as well, the poll so far is:Missy & Holly: 3 votesTrixie's Travails: 1 vote (don't let Seth catch you Trixie-non-believers!)Rainbow Dash: 3 votesI don't want to raise any false hopes- full disclosure, my RD idea is not about her legal career. Trust me when I say I'm nowhere near smart enough to write courtoom dramedy.Oh snaps mass replies AAAAAHHHH@30eb973c-9d45-11e0-94a7-000bcdcb8a73I think you just described what a Pink Jagerbomb probably does to ponies.@AnonymousHahaha, I am glad I'm able to provide you with the pony filth that shames you to the core :D@AnonymousI blame the economy, really. Not enough cast ponies to pick up the slack, I had to start hiring outside the show.@CoffeeGruntShe'll be back soon enough- and yes, the delay in Chapter 13 is entirely because of Team Fortress 2- I haven't seen you at all online brah, I usually play on the Control Point Podcast CP1 server, my Steam is The_Gravekeeper@ruff1298Oh yes,sowing chaos and discord and watching the ponies react is one of the driving forces in my writing :D@AnonymousMan, my chapters are short, but that's still quite a bit of reading! It's like reading two or three chapters of Dangerous Business in one sitting o.o@AnonymousI'm humbled that you think so highly of my writing style–what began as a fun project at the expense of Twilight has really blossomed into a labor of love, and I'm overjoyed that you and all my readers have so much praise for it; I truly appreciate it, Anon@Anonymous@AnonymousHaha, someone's been paying attention! Did you notice the other little thing I did about her Great and Powerful name? That one is quite a bit more subtle >3I'm glad you're enjoying the OC characters, that was definitely one of the major things I thought people were gonna hate XDAs for the colors, you're pretty spot-on with the colors (I like the mole, too!), though Holly's cutie mark is green, since it's three holly leaves- and don't worry, I was actually gonna post a color guide for all five OCs after Chapter 13, then all will become clear!@LordOfTheWrongsHuh. I should've known that, probably. But I didn't. *facehoof*@CoffeeGrunt@AnonymousOh man, I think I totally spoiled everyone by writing the first 10 chapters one every 2-3 days… Suddenly a week between updates and I'm marked for death!@AnonymousI'm glad to have managed to spread some Love and Tolerance your way, my good Anon!@AnonymousAre you sure you're gonna have to wait a month or two? I'd give it a one-day wait. Two, tops. *Hint hint*
@GravekeeperLooking forward to reading more. I'm really enjoying your writing style!
@GravekeeperLooking forward to reading more. I'm really enjoying your writing style!
@GravekeeperDefinitely go for Trixie's time before the Ballad. The world needs more Trixie and besides, it's relevant.Of course the better option is to write up all THREE epilogues. =P
@GravekeeperDefinitely go for Trixie's time before the Ballad. The world needs more Trixie and besides, it's relevant.Of course the better option is to write up all THREE epilogues. =P
Amazing story!
Amazing story!
Can't wait for Ch13..I love this type of story writing and it'll give me something to read when I ship out to the Middle East lol
Can't wait for Ch13..I love this type of story writing and it'll give me something to read when I ship out to the Middle East lol
@GravekeeperThe only answer of course would be: All of them.However, in order of preference, 1 being the fic I want to see first:1: Missy & Holly2: Rainbow Dash3: Trixie
@GravekeeperOkay. Your sentries are condemned for demolition.And yes, you deprived the junkies of their crack, whaddya expect? That's why I'm glad my fanfic isn't as popular as yours…yet.
@CoffeeGruntToo late! The chapter is already up! It just hasn't been updated on the ED post yet 😀
Awesome timing or WHAT!?Fuck you and your telepathy. Time to kill another half hour of my life away on this awesome fic.
YES!!!! Gravekeeper you have JUST made my day!
Best damn fanfic ever.
Heh. The last couple of chapters focused a bit less on the humour and more on developing the story. Which was fine by the way, no complaints. But the last chapter was going for the laughs a bit more again and that certainly is fine too ^^
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How does one measure love? Objectively, I mean. A profound question to say the least, but one which is ultimately futile for Twilight at the moment because she was so lost in thought thinking about it that she walked into a mailbox.I simply love how Twilight thinks of emotional concepts similar to how Data from Star Trek did.
Really enjoying this. 😀 And yeah, I'd -love- to read a Missy & Holly spin-off once you get done, they have a really fun dynamic going.
Albanian, Bulgarian, Russian, and Catalan?You really did your research, didn't you, Gravekeeper? 🙂
My keyboard is a little more battered after part 13. You see, though Alienware keyboards are extremely rugged, they are not intended for being repeatedly bludgeoned with your head while uncontrollably laughing….Why does my face hurt?
Aaaaand back to waiting for the next update.I must say, I do like Twilight's approach to romance.
@Gravekeeper At first when I saw the sword, before I relized the shield of top, it reminded me of Nagi's Sword from Okami.This is an Awesome Story! I cannot wait for the rest.And as a choice for the next story; um…I'm torn between 1 and 3.
Why can't you write them as fast as I can read them?! WHY?This story has me smiling like an idiot. Keep it up!
… I really hope this story ends up having 40 chapters, and that I have the patience to wait for each one of them.
"anesthesiology and magnetic pulse welding."I. DIED. I am now a dead pony. I hope you're happy.
where to start…I died laughing at the line "put her on my bed""be gentle with her"I laughed WAY harder than i should have at the double rainbow reference.I laughed so hard that people came to check up on me to make sure i was okay when she gt stuck in the mailbox. I was told to shut up laughing when Twilight just began to blast her way out.And now, I am laughing at you fan fic on the way to the mental hospital that you have been responsible for sending me to because of uncontrollable laughter.Thanks allot for the laugh.Now I just have to break out of the asylum (again), and it'll be about time for chapter 14.
Silly Trixie! Pinkie doesn't teleport, she spacefolds!
"Next to the bale and in plain sight sat Pinkie Pie, looking as merry as ever."LINE OF THE CHAPTER.
Have I mentioned lately how much I love this series? :DOh, and Missy was totally projecting her A.T. Field to protect her chocolates! XD
Just finished the first chapter, and there's one thing I want to mention now so I don't forget to when I get to the end.The name of the chauffer: "Holly Diver"I wonder if that's supposed to be a Dio reference?They had a song (and album) called "Holy Diver"I didn't read any of the comments yet, so I don't know if this was mentioned already.
I have to admit, the little bit of history with Trixie and the little Zecora plug-in was lovely. I enjoyed how absolutely mortified Trixie was with how unconsciously obsessed she was with our dear Twilight. It was even funnier, when you likened her psychosomatic recovery to being that of a photo album, consisting of Twilight, all the time, every time.The bit about Twilight impacting the post box was delightfully random. The little bit about Celestia giving Twilight a variation of "Apply pressure, solve problem" was utterly hilarious in how this brilliant line was placed as a quiet aside.The bit about the complex nature of Applejack's following Trixie with Rafale following Trixie was hilarious. My brain derped, then it laughed at the complexity of properly saying this setup.There was a bit of an issue with the paragraph where Twilight was mowed down, specifically, Trixie and Twilight's POVs should have been separated. It got confusing at that point, and sad to say, it broke me out of rhythm.The jokes in Spurbucks were hilarious because they were all so, so true. I especially loved the hilarious college joke.
Oh. My. Luna. I literally burst out laughing when the bay of hale was brought back, and then I completely lost it when Pinkie Pie wasn't even in it. Pllleeeeaaaassseee keep up the genius
Y'know. The fact you've taken 13 chapters to draw out the two ponies lack of realisation of each other's love, and still have it be entertaining, is awesome. I'm jelly.
@TenchiFreak5Maiboxes have stood in the way of scientific progress for far too long!@WhiteoutIt really is fun to write them, they've really grown on me and in the story (I wasn't planning on involving them that much!)@AnonymousLooks like I'm not the only one that did, eh, Anon? *bro-nerd-hoof*@MihailKSend Seth the invoice for any replacement you need- after all, he's the one that accepted the story into EqD!@AnonymousAnd when I was starting this story I didn't think it was gonna be any longer than perhaps 6 chapters or so…@Sordid EuphemismCelestia has access to Phoenix feathers- all is not lost!@AnonymousI love making people laugh at things they shouldn't laugh at–hope there's internet access at the (Arkham?) asylum!@SilverspotI was wondering who was gonna be the first to spot that!@AnonymousThat's right anon, it's a very purposeful Dio reference–you'll find a lot of references in the story; there's definitely a number of musical ones; can you recognize them all? *Who Wants to be a Millionare fanfare plays*@ruff1298Does it show that I take some issue with Starbucks's prices? Cause I do XDThe part where Twilight gets mowed down is all in her perspective, I'm not too sure what you meant there.@CoffeeGruntI tried to focus solely on Twilight and Trixie on this chapter, and I *still* didn't get them to the library. I'm going to have to make the chapters 30 pages long like Dangerous Business
Gravekeeper: "@Anonymous@AnonymousHaha, someone's been paying attention! Did you notice the other little thing I did about her Great and Powerful name? That one is quite a bit more subtle >3"This got me thinking! I wasn't sure what that meant but will try to see if I can figure it out!Does it have to do with Great being a possible legal First name, and Powerful being a Middle name with Trixie her last name, and finally, 'The' being the equivalent of Mr/Mrs/Sir/Madam when addressing somepony? or perhaps that even in your THOUGHTS she STILL speaks about herself in a 3rd person perspective! xDAlso the arguments between Trixie and 'The' Miss Spellings were priceless lolI have to say this Trixie, ever so Great, and Power, and 'The', is by far my favorite Trixie and feels by all means (not counting the shipping parts but hey why not) feels almost cannon <3GK:"I'm glad you're enjoying the OC characters, that was definitely one of the major things I thought people were gonna hate XD"Yeah I can see how some would think that, but really imo OC's are no different then Background Ponies. Like some, Octavia, DJ-P0n3, Derpy Hooves, and Lyra to name a few are no better then an OC until they get the kind of character development and love as you have given to the cast of ponies in your story. But hey that is just my humble 2 cents and don't mind if others disagree with it.GK: "As for the colors, you're pretty spot-on with the colors (I like the mole, too!), though Holly's cutie mark is green, since it's three holly leaves- and don't worry, I was actually gonna post a color guide for all five OCs after Chapter 13, then all will become clear!"Oh sounds like fun ^-^ and derp I can't believe I overlooked that obvious color for Holly's cutey mark (it was so obvious!) I look forward to see more talented people give them a go when you do release the color schemes <3Also nice to hear you liked the mold on Holly! she is so boss <3Also I'd been curious how Great and Powerful Trixie was able to come to meet miss Spelling and actually convince her to convince her to back her movie!Also I still vote for the OC characters but I also want a Trixie story too ;^; (Dash gets too much air time but after seeing how you did Dash I wouldn't mind reading a Dash fic if it came from you!)Well long post was long and now that my house chorse are done for me to finish posting this I shall now proceed to enjoy myself by reading chapter 13! take care Gravekeeper will look forward to your next project and or chapter of this story (which from how things were going almost felt like this series will go up to 20+ MUAHAHAHAA!)P.S. I still can't get over how awesome Rarity's scenes were XD and damnit why do I love Twilight so much more now?! I always avoided shipping tags expecting lame makeout stories that got a bit too into detail but thanks to you I now dive in hopes not all are as bad as I thought they'd be.P.P.S Not that I have a problem with same sex stuff, it's more I'd rather laugh or or enjoy a good adventure then hear the many ways one can describe ones lower regions and how far a tongue or hoof can go XD now this story type I can deal with.P.P.P.S. Why do I get that vibe of Sailor Uranus and Neptune when I read some of the scenes between Holly and Missy? WHY?! and WHY haven't I hit 'Post Comment' yet??? *arms flailing*
This is just too damn funny. I'm laughing so hard tears are coming out of my eyes.The comedy is spot on, the awesomeness is through the roof, and lovestruck Twilight and Trixie are just too adorable together.BEST. FANFIC. EVER.
Hey Gravekeeper…we aren't saying you have to do another chapter *picks up a gun* we're just saying its a pretty good idea.Ch14 GO GO!!!!!
>Wait, is love a wave or a particle?'-It's a 'wave' Twilight, of course. Its wavelength is located at the high extreme of the Visible Specturm, just at the limit of IR. It explain its red/red-pink color, its lower frequency thus equal a high Energy (explaining why Love is (an emotion) so powerful), it also explain why people feel warm when they start to ''feel'' (in) love. (Physics : low frequency = high energy, and vice-versa) :)… Twilight and Trixie interactions are quite lovely, especially around the 'mailbox scene' 🙂 …… Also : Scratching Point GO! 😀 (only one person will catch that one)…
@Gravekeeper>@Sordid EuphemismCelestia has access to Phoenix feathers- all is not lost!-Wait ! Did it happened inside a cutscene ? If yes, then even the Super-Soft will not do it…
>I'm glad you're enjoying the OC characters, that was definitely one of the major things I thought people were gonna hate XDHonestly, this fandom doesn't have too much trouble with OCs. We all understand that the canon cast is fairly limited, and you have to throw in OCs (or characterize background ponies, which is the same thing) just to fill out the story. It's no big deal. 🙂
@Nova25Psssst! Long wavelength = low frequency = low energy. Red is the least energetic end of the visible spectrum.
DOUBLE RAINBOW ALL THE WAYOH MAH GHAWD SO INTENSE!!!anyway, this is really funny, im squeaking while reading this lol. Friendship lubricant? I laughed so hard.and its okay officer… I swear to drunk im not god!….no?But I'm not too drive to drunk!
No word from the author in 16 days. My epic story sense tells me either next update is very soon or Gravekeeper is dead.
I will forever call Alcohol Friendship Lubricant from now on. Brilliant.
@GravekeeperMay I vote for all three? 😀
What ever happened to this story?
Rumors of my death have been greatly exaggerated, my good bronies; the short story is that I've been extremely busy these past couple weeks and haven't had the time to sit down for a long enough period of time to finish the chapter.I actually have two versions of the chapter because I'm still deciding some of the order of events, but I'm gonna try to get this one done by tomorrow because I want the chapter to be up as much as you guys do!I'll post a bit later to do a mass reply; back to writing!
@GravekeeperIt's quite alright man. You don't get to be the greatest and most powerful story on the blog by rushing anything. I'm sure it will be well worth the wait when the next chapter is feed into our hungry, waiting eyeballs.
@Gravekeeper We waited +20 days, we sure as hell can wait a little more, just take your time, since I know this chapter will be as good as the others!
This story is amazing, can't wait for the next chapter, keep up the good work ^-^
I love the innuendo with the horns, and the follow up innuendo after that.Lol, premature magic'd all over her face.
Gravekeep's ALIVE! *faints**is given Smelling Salts*WHOA! ohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygosh…..*faints from lack of inhaling**given smelling salts and a brown paper bag to breath into*SO GLAD YOUR BACK! =D take your time really though I can wait a bit longer! *hyperventilates into paper bag, someone slaps the bag at it's fullest**GASP!* Y U DO DAT!?and WHY DIS ONLY GET 302 COMMENTS! TIS UNFAIR! This not being over 1000 comments is making Fluttershy cry, you like seeing her cry don't you people? DON'T YOU?!Yes it HAS a shipping tag! but get over it! READ THIS NAOW! This and Past Sins are as equally good reads with or without shipping tags!*pets Fluttershy*It's ok now… everything will be alright, shhh~ now ignore the insecure ponies, shhh~ there there *continues petting Fluttershy while combing her mane*/Cátsy the too lazy/shy to make an account, mostly lazy though…
No rush at all – if you need time, have as much as you need. That said, I REALLY hope you don't need much more… but I can be patient if it means better quality
By the way guys, Gravey's been abandoning us for BC2 and TF2, the horror, THE HORROOOR!!Seriously though mate, I've written a 10k chapter and two 4k chapters since this, head in the game Engy. :PBtw was that a Halo Reach reference?
"All chapters after the break"What does that mean? How long is this break? Do want chapter 14! It's deliciousness will be, delicious..
@Demolicious "The break" refers to the point where a post on the blog cuts off and displays "read more". So what Seth meant when he said that all the links were "after the break" was that to read the chapters, you had to click "read more" on the post.As for when the next chapter's coming out… Gravekeeper posted about a week ago saying that he was about done with the next chapter and going to submit it soon. Pretty sure he died, though. That's what ED tends to decide every time an author goes over three days without updating.
tl;dr of my review: "Twixie time! I love that term! Twixie Twixie Twixie.The Greatest most Powerful Story on the blog." -Seth (Full review below)Wall-of-text of a review that doesn't matter:"Confound them ponies they drive me to read fan fiction but I like it."-AnonymousWell this is the first FF that I ever read in my life and after doing so I acquired an interest to read more.Well it's funny and the shipping well…as much as I am anti-shipping(Not so much anymore maybe my shipping preferences will be selective Twixie being one.) this piece of art is really well made. The comedy and shipping is balanced that it penetrates to me faster kind of feeling like I am weak on my knees from both laughing and the awkward feeling of reading and liking a shipping fic with an added bonus that The Great and Powerful Trixie is my favorite character and Twilight being the pony whom I have the most similarities with.Also the side stories are great and everyone gets enough attention. Rarity kicks police butt, RD is Phoenix Wright, Fluttershy as herself but with an iron liver, AJ who is pro-love as said on the fic, and Pinkie being Pinkie (I ain't explaining sh*t because it's Pinkie). And Spike well also being Spike.Then the OCs are really well done too. They just pop-up out of nowhere like for example at the latest chapter Rafale just pops up out of nowhere with AJ and company and the reasons why they are there. Then Holly and Miss Spelling were also there eating chocolate.Story: 5/5Characters: 5/5Comedy: 5/5Shipping: 5/5Twixie: Take all my bits/5Final rating: 5/5 while taking all my bits
I still love the whole scene where Twilight gets plowed by Trixie! (wait… poor choic of words considering this has a shipping tag!)*ahem* I love the WHOLE chase scene with Twilight and Trixie being cutesy and them running through the crowd like a couple silly fillies playing tag <3That last chapter especially near the end was d'aww inducing and funny as all hell xD
Eagerly waiting for the next bit of this. 😀
Want more Dramatic reading! =DIt's fun listening to him tell tell the story like that. Also would save me from reading that epicly long story myself a second time over in it's entirety XD
CONFOUND THIS AUTHOR! HIS LATENESS IN UPDATES DUE TO GAMING AND HAVING A LIFE DRIVE ME TO RE-READ HIS 13 CHAPTERS AGAIN!I hope you surprise us with 2-3+ chapters as a certain other story did at a time! or at least a reeeaaaallly long chapter! because I'm almost done reading this story over a second time! xD
Ok, you win Gravekeeper, I am now willing to beg for more chapters. In all seriousness though I am glad to hear you're still working on this. I was really afraid you had abandoned this fic, which would have been a real tragedy.
Crap, now I truly want to read the new chapter, after tonight's fiasco with the ending of "Of Mares and Magic", but again Gravekeeper, take your time, don't rush it, and for the love of Luna and her new republic, please don't end it in a sad tone, please, today's hit was too much for my fanfic reading self…
@Enrique262I know how you feel man, It was like a punch in the gut. I've decided to do the next best thing, and reread all the old chapters… again. Maybe some actual twixie will cheer me up.
@VolkI agree. I feel like that story ended up betraying the readers. It'd be fine if that wasn't the last chapter…GRAVEKEEPER, I call upon you to save us from this wallowing pit of despair! HELP US, YOU ARE OUR ONLY HOPE. D: