Story: With a Heavy Heart (Update Part 8!)

[Shipping][Sad]

Author: Krypqe

Description: Pinkie Pie is gone, Vanished, in the dead of night. Meanwhile, Rainbow Dash is on the verge of losing Two more of her closest friends, as she learns of the complications of a Love triangle, even if she doesn’t realise yet…

With a Heavy Heart Part 1
With a Heavy Heart Part 2 
With a Heavy Heart Part 3
With a Heavy Heart Part 4
With a Heavy Heart Part 5
With a Heavy Heart Part 6 
With a Heavy Heart Interlude
With a Heavy Heart Part 7
With a Heavy Heart Part 8 (New!)

Additional Tags: Love Triangle, Mystery, Confusion, Self-Discovery.

This entry was posted in Author: Krypqe, Incomplete, Rainbow Dash, Sad, Shipping, Star-5, Story, Twilight Sparkle. Bookmark the permalink.

130 Responses to Story: With a Heavy Heart (Update Part 8!)

  1. Chris says:

    Confusion…indeed!

  2. Anonymous says:

    … I sense a disturbance in the pony force…

  3. Anonymous says:

    I am intrigued…You may continue.

  4. Anonymous says:

    Labels: IncompleteFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUU-~Scratch

  5. Anonymous says:

    I am very interested. Please finish this story! Great dialogue so far! Seems very natural. Also i liked how you described the setting, it let my mind come up with great imagery while the ponies spoke.

  6. BenX says:

    I really liked how you made Rainbow Dash keep up her cool persona like that.Great Story, can't wait for more!

  7. Anonymous says:

    That image of Dash makes me feel… a little strange.

  8. Anonymous says:

    what's the triangle?I don't want to read until I know.It has happened to me, reading Dash shipping stories, and suddenly, straight RD.

  9. Anonymous says:

    @Anonymousoh, I wouldn't like that. I find Dash to be the cutest with Pinkie.Her in a straight relationship doesn't really work for me.

  10. Anonymous says:

    Did Twilight accidentally stab Dash?Cuz the gash in her head…She fell onto Twilight…

  11. 9Nine9 says:

    Your writing style is very good for that setting, I only hope that when you get to a less tense or slower paced scene that you really flush out the situation more. Also the implications of anon just above this seem to be correct, which is QUITE a quandary I'd say.

  12. I like it, better than most I see on here, can't wait for more.

  13. Cubed says:

    Bad spacing. I'm sure it's fairly well-written, though. 3:

  14. Anonymous says:

    Pardon me, everyone, but which was the fanfic that began with Equestria in the middle of a drought and Rainbow Dash struggling to send scarce rain to some areas?

  15. Anonymous says:

    Said story was not written as well as I had hoped, but it gets bonus points for saying "hoofed the bill". Classic.

  16. Rainbow Derp says:

    I can't wait for more! 😀

  17. Oh, a triangle love story?Funny, I always expected something involving Pinkie and Applejack fighting over RD.

  18. krypqe says:

    @AnonymousStraight Rainbow Dash?What are you on, Bro?I'm gonna throw this out there; She's not gonna be straight.That's a definite.

  19. Epona says:

    can't wait to see chapter 2!!!

  20. Anonymous says:

    Eagerly waiting on chapter 2

  21. Anonymous says:

    ARRRGH I NEED PART THREE ALREADY!!!

  22. fireant says:

    Enjoy it so far ;)Like the idea of showing our beloved ponies in a little more realistic, grim light, presenting their feelings without the cotton-candy wrapping or other sugary additions. You can actualy sense LUST in here, and that is so wrong in a perfect way, If anypony follow me here x) I can't wait to see more of this, and read about Drunken Twilight being Snappy, Rainbow being even more confused and WTH is happening to Pinks.Keep it up!

  23. Anonymous says:

    Eagerly waiting on chapter 3

  24. Anonymous says:

    I really like this one. I really want the next chapter already! 😮

  25. 9Nine9 says:

    @9Nine9And you kept up this tense pacing with constant realizations and very in-character thought patterns. The setting is dark; literally and even figuratively, as I imagine the dark library and these two thinking and realizing their thoughts and erros of that night, it all fits together to make a very high-pressure situation, even if nothing is happening physically.I look forward to your writing.Also please indent your paragraphs, or perhaps put a blank line between paragraphs. The formatting is fairly annoying.

  26. Anonymous says:

    I CANNOT read it in that format. I'm on my knees. PLEASE indent.

  27. krypqe says:

    @AnonymousBut I hate indenting…>Plus, we don't really indent over in England; It's kind of an Arcane practice.I can try and space it out more, if that's what everypony wants, and if it doesn't fracture the flow of the prose too much; but Indenting? I say neigh to that.

  28. Anonymous says:

    Innntresting tale, chap!Post moar!

  29. Anonymous says:

    Really good story so far… though I think in a few instances it may tend to go a little too far in describing certain things. It can be hard to find that balance between being too descriptive of a scene and not quite descriptive enough, and I think this may veer into the latter cateogry every so often.Otherwise, though, very interesting so far. Though I'm not sure I like the idea of Rainbow having a "friends with benefits" arrangement (which is the impression I got from her description). Yeah, she's impulsive and seems like a bit of a partier, but I hope she genuinely would like to care about someone she's with as opposed to just booty calls or whatever.

  30. SyrinKitty says:

    @krypqe: Indenting is still used in a lot of places to denote a new paragraph or train of thought. It makes it far more readable, trust me. Another thing I can say is that I got lost very quickly as to who was saying what. Unless it's established that it's a conversation between two people, the dialogue can become very hard to figure out who is saying what to whom. However, past all that, it is a very nice story. Keep it up!

  31. Anonymous says:

    Shipping, but also sad.Don't know if want. >_>

  32. Anonymous says:

    Update quicker, this story is really good.

  33. NinesTempest says:

    Gosh, this is really oddly well written. Such a somber tone and well set, emotions overflowing and well within character. This is just well done, even with single-paragraph sentences. It's too odd of a style to not like as far as I see it.

  34. g3fizzypop says:

    Yay! This sory just starts to be very intresting and intim. I love the Twilight Sparkle and Rainbow Dash Shipping stories.

  35. Anonymous says:

    WHERE THE FUCK IS PART 4 DO IT NOW!!! >:L

  36. Anonymous says:

    it kinda gives you the feeling that your reading a edgar allan poe story or something. but all in all awesome story.

  37. Anonymous says:

    pleeeeeese part 4?

  38. MOARRRRRSeriously, this is really good stuff.

  39. Anonymous says:

    Would be nice to have an ETA on part 4 :[

  40. A1CZERO says:

    Is it getting hot in here or is it just me?

  41. krypqe says:

    @AnonymousIt's in the works, bro.The whole chapter is planned out, and I'm part the way through writing it.But I'm not a machine, bro, give a brony some time!

  42. DooDawDay says:

    it's been a while, oh well…GUESS I'LL JUST HAVE READ IT ALL AGAIN! XD

  43. fireant says:

    Sorry to say, but I downgraded on this fic after last chapter – I like the story, I like Twilight and how she is portrayed, what I hate is very poorly (in my opinion, bear it in mind) written moments of intimacy. Like with the kissing in the tub – the same thought were reapeted there like three times, with the entire "became one" thing. I felt pain from reading these senteces and I was distorted and unable to enjoy the tension.So sorry, but I Must SEE improvement in the lusty-intimacy sentences wording to enjoy it properly!

  44. Anonymous says:

    Loving the story so far, you always leave me questioning about what will happen next! It's pretty well written too imo. Part 5 please! =D

  45. The last sentence of part 4 ruined it for me. SPOILER:I don't like Appledash.

  46. Anonymous says:

    @Narwhals' Bend It is still entirely possible that she isn't that other filly. For all we know Dash might just want to talk to her for advice.

  47. SPOILERHuh, weird. All this foreshadowing with Pinkie Pie made me guess it was DashiePie. This was a throw off.

  48. krypqe says:

    @fireantAh, I wondered whether this would come to contention…Well; firstly, I'd like to thank you for the crit; It's impossible to know how to do better if nopony speaks their mind.Anyway, ONWARD!I can see why you'd dislike the repetition of a cheesy line such as 'becoming one…' but there is a perfectly good explanation for this: Throughout the story, (Especially in chapters 3+4) we see the dawning of Rainbow's insecurity; she absolutly has to be the coolest, and the best. Although this point is mentioned explicitly a couple of times, her insecurities are also portrayed through her need to latch on to things, especially reassuring, repetative phrases, others being: "It just wouldn't be cool." and "Play it cool"The 'becoming one' idea was partly formed by this reason.The other reason would be due to Rainbow's apparent lack of romantic knowledge; She's only had 'relations' one time before, and as we're told earlier in the story, It'd been unplanned and she'd been insecure. So much so that Rainbow has to refer to her as that other filly constantly, instead of her actual name, which Rainbow would do in any other situation.Thus; we can deduce that Rainbow has a somewhat confused, childlike view of love and romance, which would lead her to believe in cheesy, clichéd ideals of love, like "Becoming one," and as she has not much else to base her view of romance on, she has to latch to the choise couple of things she actually knows.Of course; If it really is that unbearably cheesy; I'll jumble it about a bit. After all, It's all well and good encoding ideas into a story, but the audience has to actually be able to read it…Tell me what you think.-Krypqe

  49. Anonymous says:

    Awesome job i can't wait for more

  50. NinesTempest says:

    @Narwhals' Bend… You serious? I honestly believe that's the best ship of the mane cast.Anyway, Author, what kind of books have you read? Every read Blood Meridian? Very famous book, bloody and violent and dark. Adult rated to holy hell for it's gore, but not that alone; it's descriptions and settings and everything about it is violent, dark, bloody. It's intense. I can't think of any other book where describing a sunset and the outlook of a desert from a dune would be called "bloody and violent."This story honestly reminds me somewhat of that. It's incredibly intense, even when there isn't a lot happening besides "Twilight walked Rainbow Dash to her house and then they got in the bathtub together." It's powerful, emotional, and even if you don't have the soaring rhetoric that Blood Meridian has, that same passion and same intensity is still there. I love your style and I can't wait for more.

  51. fireant says:

    @krypqeGood response and clear some things a bit. I can truly understand that RD have a little childish (well, a lot, in fact) experiance and ways of describing a romantic situation. And this is not what was bothering me – I can read a cheesy line with a smile, because I know from WHERE the cheese came at the first place. Everypony knows that RD is the most verbally limited of all the ponies, a she can't deal with her emotions with words at all. That is cool. That is why in the first comment in this series I posted was quite positive. I can still sense some serious lovin' and lust in here and that is great, especially in comparison to all standard sappy-mushy ships with cuddling and puppy love.In fact, this senselessly long comment is here only to proclaim, that I personally HATE to read the same thing trice – I've got the idea of becoming one with just one telling of this happening 😉 I don't know, maybe I am overy nitpicky with this, but it simply twitchin' me inside.Don't You worry, I am still waiting and looking forward to next chapters. It's a good work of fiction, just in the last chapter I found this THING with constant repeating of a single thought too distracting.:) Keep it up,

  52. Anonymous says:

    Appledash?NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO…

  53. @AnonymousScrew you, any ship with Dash in it is awesome. Except OCs.

  54. Anonymous says:

    Gotta say, I like how you make DashxTwi and ApplexDash "accidents". It really fits. I can't imaging Rainbow building a relationship. But I can imagine her waking up in someone else's bed!

  55. g3fizzypop says:

    It's so addictive plus I'm a RainbowSparkle fan. I can't wait to read more.

  56. krypqe says:

    @NinesTempestI've not read Blood Meridian, but now you've mentioned it, I'll give it a go, I'm intrigued!(To be honest, any book which can have the complement of the word 'intense', I'd read. I like to be emotionally involved with what I read.)My favourite author, by far is Iain Banks. He's bloody fantastic, and I've not read anything by him I didn't like. He does some sci-fi, but It's mostly just regular fiction, but with an 'Iain Banks' feel; I honestly couldn't describe it any other way… (Try reading 'Dead Air' and 'Transition')Also; Khaled Hosseini's two novels are fantastically intense, but they'd also be adult rated. (Parts of 'The Kite Runner' left me speechless.) But they're fantastic.Thanks for the kind review, by the way. It's much appreciated.(And thank you for reading; You're awesome!)———@fireantDude; Being overly nitpicky is better than being less so. Like I said, If nopony speaks up, how am I going to know whether to change things?I'm going to lose one of the 'Becoming one's, and maybe alter the flow a tad, as It's evidently a bit of a problem. Rest assured, I'll still keep some of the cheese. Rainbow's words and moves aren't that slick… :PCheers for reading.-Krypqe

  57. Water_Wolf says:

    i do enjoy the cheese :3 BUT OMGWTFBBQ I NEED NUMBER 5 LIEK NOW OR I'LL EXPLODE GIMMIE THE RAINBOWSPARKLEJACKS

  58. NinesTempest says:

    I want an update of this ;w;

  59. NinesTempest says:

    Another INTENSE chapter. Honestly, that is the ONLY way to describe these. Thick with feeling and emotion, actions and thoughts. Reflecting, while keeping ponies ridiculously in character. I get shivers reading this, and I have to take breaks. I defer, once again, to Blood Miridian. That book made everything seem violent and bloody. You are making something so short and simple turn into a huge thundering turmoil of thought and emotion and damnit it flows perfectly, just like that wonderful novel.

  60. Water_Wolf says:

    NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! Again! it ended waaay too quickly! i want to cry now! make more damnit! i need my fix!

  61. Baree says:

    Oh man, you're evil. Chapter 5 is just one big tease 😛 Very little gets resolved, instead we get only more questions. I can only hope the wait for chapter 6 won't be as long.

  62. NinesTempest says:

    >sleeps>wakes up>still 4 starswhy.png? One of the best ship fics on the site gets so little attention…

  63. Anonymous says:

    Im a little confused about the story i know most of it …. up to know anyone wanna help me? if so put !!!!!!!!****SPOILER****!!!!!!!! in the comment.tbh its mainly part 5 thats confusing me a bit.(D4SHTH3R4INB0W)

  64. krypqe says:

    Heya Everypony!I'd just like to say a thank you to you all for all the support and whatnot! It's really appreciated, and it keeps me going to no end! I'll do my best to get a new chapter up ASAP!ILY All!@AnonymousSure, bro!What did you want explaining?(I'm not quite sure what you're asking about…)

  65. Anonymous says:

    Dude, chapter five made me tear up.

  66. Anonymous says:

    Oh gawd, Twilight gave rainbow "painkillers" when shes been drinking. She should know better than that.

  67. Anonymous says:

    Oh gawd, Twilight gave rainbow "painkillers" when shes been drinking. She should know better than that.

  68. krypqe says:

    @JamesSorry for the wait, bro.I'd just like to say, before the next chapter goes up, that I'm really busy with real world stuff at the moment (Shocking, I know!) and whilst I'd like to get material out there ASAP, I wouldn't want to rush the writing and compromise the quality, or replace my life with pony fanfiction. (Which It's seemingly doing anyway!)I hope this clears things up a tad!

  69. krypqe says:

    @JamesSorry for the wait, bro.I'd just like to say, before the next chapter goes up, that I'm really busy with real world stuff at the moment (Shocking, I know!) and whilst I'd like to get material out there ASAP, I wouldn't want to rush the writing and compromise the quality, or replace my life with pony fanfiction. (Which It's seemingly doing anyway!)I hope this clears things up a tad!

  70. James says:

    @krypqeThanks for replying Krypqe, take as long as you need! I for one am checking this everyday anyway. Anyways, sorry if i made you feel bad, but don't even THINK of compromising or rushing! Though it seems whatever you dish out is awesome anyway.Just gonna keep re-reading this. Always keeps me hooked, which is in itself an achievement.

  71. James says:

    @krypqeThanks for replying Krypqe, take as long as you need! I for one am checking this everyday anyway. Anyways, sorry if i made you feel bad, but don't even THINK of compromising or rushing! Though it seems whatever you dish out is awesome anyway.Just gonna keep re-reading this. Always keeps me hooked, which is in itself an achievement.

  72. Minalkra says:

    this reminds me of 'everypony loves rainbow dash' only serious and sensible. and not everyone, of course. uhm. it's really well written and very emotional, uh, though it may go over my head sometimes. sorry. i like it though i haven't seen any repercussions from Pinkie Pie's disappearance. but it hasn't even been a single day yet, so … i should probably not even post that part because i'm sure you're getting to it and all.one thing about this, the repetition. i use that myself when i write, though i don't post anywhere. too short, not good. anyway, i use repetition as a type of near-stream of consciousness thing. we repeat ourselves in our heads a lot and if i'm trying to show that something is coming out of a character's mind almost verbatim, i'll repeat things a lot. very rarely for emphasis but sometimes. i've never thought of it as annoying and i thought that was rather well done and thought out, to indicate that we were essentially inside of Rainbow Dash's thought process then.but that's just me and i'm not a good reader or writer anyway. whatever you want to do is probably better than what i'd do anyway. sorry i can't think of anything better to say.

  73. Minalkra says:

    this reminds me of 'everypony loves rainbow dash' only serious and sensible. and not everyone, of course. uhm. it's really well written and very emotional, uh, though it may go over my head sometimes. sorry. i like it though i haven't seen any repercussions from Pinkie Pie's disappearance. but it hasn't even been a single day yet, so … i should probably not even post that part because i'm sure you're getting to it and all.one thing about this, the repetition. i use that myself when i write, though i don't post anywhere. too short, not good. anyway, i use repetition as a type of near-stream of consciousness thing. we repeat ourselves in our heads a lot and if i'm trying to show that something is coming out of a character's mind almost verbatim, i'll repeat things a lot. very rarely for emphasis but sometimes. i've never thought of it as annoying and i thought that was rather well done and thought out, to indicate that we were essentially inside of Rainbow Dash's thought process then.but that's just me and i'm not a good reader or writer anyway. whatever you want to do is probably better than what i'd do anyway. sorry i can't think of anything better to say.

  74. Minalkra says:

    opps, forgot to take out that thing about Pinkie Pie. sorry! sorry …

  75. Minalkra says:

    opps, forgot to take out that thing about Pinkie Pie. sorry! sorry …

  76. NinesTempest says:

    Another good chapter. I insist still that the style is unique and keeps the story VERY good and very powerful, and your perspective shifts help the readers guessing in a good way. You leave us with enough information of TS/AJ to know how they feel about RD, but you only give us so much of what RD sees that it DEFINITELY leaves us wanting more.It's a good balance of information, and I still think you're hitting it spot on. I think, since adding Applejack, this is only going to get harder, but you're doing well.So… when does Pinkie Pie get involved?

  77. NinesTempest says:

    Another good chapter. I insist still that the style is unique and keeps the story VERY good and very powerful, and your perspective shifts help the readers guessing in a good way. You leave us with enough information of TS/AJ to know how they feel about RD, but you only give us so much of what RD sees that it DEFINITELY leaves us wanting more.It's a good balance of information, and I still think you're hitting it spot on. I think, since adding Applejack, this is only going to get harder, but you're doing well.So… when does Pinkie Pie get involved?

  78. TenchiFreak5 says:

    Another great chapter. Copy what NinesTempest said just above and paste it in this comment as well.

  79. TenchiFreak5 says:

    Another great chapter. Copy what NinesTempest said just above and paste it in this comment as well.

  80. Anonymous says:

    I approve. This is starting to become quite the heart-twister.Continue please.

  81. Anonymous says:

    I approve. This is starting to become quite the heart-twister.Continue please.

  82. MrMaerta says:

    I love this fanfic. One of my favorites! Keep up the good work!

  83. MrMaerta says:

    I love this fanfic. One of my favorites! Keep up the good work!

  84. Nova25 says:

    Pinky Pie in chapter 1… a weird and vague thing about her leaving for some unknown reasons, in a bland way…What's happening with her ?…last chapter… Twilight's reaction was 'interesting', with the pillow, her way to realize that she's ''In Love''.

  85. Nova25 says:

    Pinky Pie in chapter 1… a weird and vague thing about her leaving for some unknown reasons, in a bland way…What's happening with her ?…last chapter… Twilight's reaction was 'interesting', with the pillow, her way to realize that she's ''In Love''.

  86. i_love_lamps says:

    an amazing story!!, i feel really bd for apple jack though, bless her hooves

  87. i_love_lamps says:

    an amazing story!!, i feel really bd for apple jack though, bless her hooves

  88. Anonymous says:

    The picture of Dash at the top of this page is pretty much my face while reading this story.

  89. Anonymous says:

    The picture of Dash at the top of this page is pretty much my face while reading this story.

  90. krypqe says:

    Firstly, I'd just like to say a massive 'Thankyou, you're fantastic!' to everypony who has read the story, and left me wonderful comments and ratings, you have no idea how much I value them! If you have any questions, just ask, I'll do my best to answer them!@MinalkraHaha, I'd never made that connection before! (Everypony loves Rainbow Dash because she's so awesome!)It's nice to see someponyelse who likes to use repetition within their writing! It really is how we think, huh?(I try not to listen to my thought processes sometimes, though. The amount of random crap I think of is unparalleled!)Also, don't be a silly filly! I was expecting the questioning of Pinkie Pie's appearance. The main reason we've not seen any repercussions is because none of the characters we're currently following have encountered anything to do with Pinkie Pie, yet. So, It'd make sense for her not to be mentioned…Also, you've thought of excellent things to say! Don't put yourself down!I appreciate all the comments I get, each time I see a new one, I feel happy for the rest of the day!@NinesTempestHehe, you're too kind, Nines! >When does Pinkie Pie get involved?Next update, bro. (Thanks for commenting with every update, It's really appreciated!)@Nova25What's happening with her?You'll have to wait and find out, I'm not giving that much away in the comments…@AnonymousYou feel like the pic of Dash?Is that the wingboner, or the feigned boredom?But seriously, If you don't like it, that's fine. Maybe just tell me why, as I'd like to know.I was never expecting this to appeal to everypony, as nothing ever does appeal to everypony. @AnonymousAlso, you have no idea how much the "HAVE AT YOU" made me laugh.Props to you, bro.Once again, thanks to everypony for reading.ILY all!/longestcommentever-Krypqe

  91. krypqe says:

    Firstly, I'd just like to say a massive 'Thankyou, you're fantastic!' to everypony who has read the story, and left me wonderful comments and ratings, you have no idea how much I value them! If you have any questions, just ask, I'll do my best to answer them!@MinalkraHaha, I'd never made that connection before! (Everypony loves Rainbow Dash because she's so awesome!)It's nice to see someponyelse who likes to use repetition within their writing! It really is how we think, huh?(I try not to listen to my thought processes sometimes, though. The amount of random crap I think of is unparalleled!)Also, don't be a silly filly! I was expecting the questioning of Pinkie Pie's appearance. The main reason we've not seen any repercussions is because none of the characters we're currently following have encountered anything to do with Pinkie Pie, yet. So, It'd make sense for her not to be mentioned…Also, you've thought of excellent things to say! Don't put yourself down!I appreciate all the comments I get, each time I see a new one, I feel happy for the rest of the day!@NinesTempestHehe, you're too kind, Nines! >When does Pinkie Pie get involved?Next update, bro. (Thanks for commenting with every update, It's really appreciated!)@Nova25What's happening with her?You'll have to wait and find out, I'm not giving that much away in the comments…@AnonymousYou feel like the pic of Dash?Is that the wingboner, or the feigned boredom?But seriously, If you don't like it, that's fine. Maybe just tell me why, as I'd like to know.I was never expecting this to appeal to everypony, as nothing ever does appeal to everypony. @AnonymousAlso, you have no idea how much the "HAVE AT YOU" made me laugh.Props to you, bro.Once again, thanks to everypony for reading.ILY all!/longestcommentever-Krypqe

  92. Shippo says:

    I Just read the first part today as a "Bed time" story before I go to dream land. I will say this was a very well intro to your story. I can not wait to read more. Though now I need to sleep. For I need to wake up in 5 hours XDKeep up the gear writing my friend!

  93. Shippo says:

    I Just read the first part today as a "Bed time" story before I go to dream land. I will say this was a very well intro to your story. I can not wait to read more. Though now I need to sleep. For I need to wake up in 5 hours XDKeep up the gear writing my friend!

  94. TenchiFreak5 says:

    @krypqeIn regards to the Pinkie Pie mystery, hasn't it only been like a day in-story anyways?

  95. TenchiFreak5 says:

    @krypqeIn regards to the Pinkie Pie mystery, hasn't it only been like a day in-story anyways?

  96. krypqe says:

    @TenchiFreak5Yeah, the story started in the evening of the night before, and now it's merely the next morning. So really, it only seems like a really long time becasue of how much I've written/how long it's taken me to do so.

  97. krypqe says:

    @TenchiFreak5Yeah, the story started in the evening of the night before, and now it's merely the next morning. So really, it only seems like a really long time becasue of how much I've written/how long it's taken me to do so.

  98. Anonymous says:

    @Krypqe well i havn't read over in a while so basicly ….. i know about between twilight and rainbow but the part with dash and applejack just confused me-D4SHTH3R4INB0W

  99. Anonymous says:

    @Krypqe well i havn't read over in a while so basicly ….. i know about between twilight and rainbow but the part with dash and applejack just confused me-D4SHTH3R4INB0W

  100. James says:

    Y DUS IT TAEK SOOOOO LOOOOOONGGGG T_TI think I'm going to start writing a fanfic for this fanfic, I'm going to go into overdrive if i can't read good shipping, and IMO, yours is the best. Or a huge pisstake , i dunno.

  101. James says:

    Y DUS IT TAEK SOOOOO LOOOOOONGGGG T_TI think I'm going to start writing a fanfic for this fanfic, I'm going to go into overdrive if i can't read good shipping, and IMO, yours is the best. Or a huge pisstake , i dunno.

  102. krypqe says:

    @AnonymousLook, dude, I can hardly explain all motive and reasoning behind the story here.Just drop me an email at krypqe@derpymail.com with perhaps a little more detail and then maybe I can help.@JamesIt takes so long because I'm a terrible, terrible person.I was going to include a list of reasons why it's been so long, but for the most part, it'd just be bad excuses trying to cover up how utterly lazy I am…Wow, I'm really flattered!I'm flattered that you even think mine's the best, let alone wanting to write a fanfic for my fanfic! (Fanfiception… :P)Ah, the reason I'm replying now, is that there should be an update very, very soon! (AKA: I've sent the update to Seth!)-Krypqe

  103. Anonymous says:

    @AnonymousPART SEVEN NOOOOOOOOW

  104. PRODVDi says:

    It goes so well with the current banner.

  105. Anonymous says:

    WOOOO NEW PART!XD

  106. Anonymous says:

    The delay of Pinkie Pie evidence perturbs me.

  107. NinesTempest says:

    Ya'know, I still think this should be six stars.Oh well…

  108. Baree says:

    The last two chapters seem to have lost some of the… I don't know… The previous chapters seemed "real", I'm not sure how to describe it. There was a raw core essence there that really worked. I see that vibe slipping a bit though.Nevertheless, still a good read. Especially the relation between Ms Cake and Pinkie. That still had that vibe I mentioned. And perhaps next chapter we will find out what is going on with Pinkie exactly.

  109. TenchiFreak5 says:

    And so it begins.Copy what NineTempest said immediately above and paste it here (again). WHY U NO 6-Star?

  110. Taliesin says:

    I demand more :3

  111. Ha ha, I just noticed this matches the new banner.Decided I would make a blogger account so I could start commenting on this site. Congrats krypqe, you have the honour of inspiring my first comment! ;DTwas a great read so far, really enjoying how the emotions between the characters are playing out. Never thought ponies would make me sit up and notice fanfics. xDAnd also, wooh Britfag Brony! *high fives*

  112. qzole says:

    Reporting a typo I found, when Rainbow Dash was thinking in her room, around middle part: 'relationship' was written as 'relation ship'Really like it so far, altough Twilight seems a tiny bit too naive some times, I think.

  113. Anonymous says:

    Amazing. Probably one of my favorite fics. But the end of chapter 7? So much suspense!! Need.. chapter.. 8

  114. Anonymous says:

    This is my favorite fic on this entire site!! I normally dont like shipping fics either. Everytime i check EqD i hope to see an update from you!

  115. Anonymous says:

    Read it at 3 in the morning. Loved it.Read it with a group of friends in the common room the next morning. We all loved it.

  116. Anonymous says:

    Yes! Need more! I hope you haven't forgotten about your story! ;]

  117. Anonymous says:

    Don't rush your work, but know we're still excited to read your next chapter.–Previous Anon who reads in his dorm common room.

  118. Anonymous says:

    UPDATE THIS GODDAMN YOU

  119. krypqe says:

    Well, everypony, thank you so much for all the motivation and kindness you've given me, but I'm afraid I have a confession to make.I'm going AFK for a month. A whole Month.This is not abandonment of this story, I will finish writing it! That's a promise!I'll see you all when I'm back…-Krypqe

  120. Anonymous says:

    HAAAH AHAHAHAHAHA

  121. Anonymous says:

    Well, see you in September.There are now six people in this common room waiting for ya.–Common Room Anon (Yes, from before. I have you bookmarked.)

  122. Anonymous says:

    Update or ill suicide and respawn! =o

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