Story: A Day for Spike and Twilight

[Normal] This one actually drops a bunch of references to dangerous business, for those wondering!

Author: Jetfire

Description: On a beautiful spring day, Twilight Sparkle finds herself alone- save for her oldest friend.

A Day for Spike and Twilight

Additional Tags: Spike, Twilight Sparkle, Family, Friends

This entry was posted in Author: Jetfire, Complete, Normal, Spike, Star-6, Story, Twilight Sparkle. Bookmark the permalink.

88 Responses to Story: A Day for Spike and Twilight

  1. Aluzird says:

    Mother/Son relationship much?

  2. Not sure what to think.

  3. Anonymous says:

    That was pretty heartwarming, excellent fic.

  4. Anonymous says:

    Will I ever get first?

  5. Isn't spike her "youngest" friend? *Hyuk hyuk*

  6. ShadowCell says:

    Once I reached the part with the phonograph, I had to stop for a minute to get the image of Twilight and Spike doing the Carlton dance out of my head.Took a while.

  7. GAAAAAAAAAAH JETFIRE!!!!! MUST READ!!!!

  8. Mustanx says:

    Wow, that was amazing. I was able to imagine every scene because of all the detail that was put into it. Excellent job. Even though I wanted to do something else, I regret no minute I read this story.

  9. Anonymous says:

    So much raw, dedicated emotion; a superb story with an excellent climax!

  10. Anonymous says:

    Fantastic followup to Dangerous Business. Jetfire, you are easily my favourite author featured on ED, and I can't wait to read more from you!

  11. RaiserXI says:

    A beautiful story, much the same as your previous works and definitely worthy of 5, preferably 6, stars.I especially love the connections back to your Greatest Work, Dangerous Business ^_^I look forward to your next one too!"Your's in Fellowship,"Raiser XI

  12. Homfrog says:

    Why do we keep asking these rhetorical questions?

  13. Var says:

    You really nailed the emotions at play in this piece. Great work.

  14. Anonymous says:

    oh my god this is just so heartwarming! just… I really hope they bring this up in season 2. Its just so sweet that ya, Twi basically is playing Mom for Spike, which is never addressed. I just loved this in every way, shape and form.Kudos on being awesome. (5/5)

  15. This was so wonderful and heartwarming, and I loved the call-backs to Dangerous Business.I think I see some more seeds for future stories in there too. :3

  16. Anonymous says:

    The author really captured each character's personalities. This story really feels like an episode from the show (besides the more mature elements in it). Great story.

  17. Ekevoo says:

    How lovely ^^ And I squee'd at Dangerous Business references. :)I've seen a few visits to that theme, but that was the most tactful one for sure. I can actually imagine an episode about this.Great work ^^

  18. Icehawk says:

    Very nicely written and heartwarming story, I have always figured Twilight to be something of a mother figure to Spike than just a friend and mentor and this story expanded on that notion perfectly. Would be really nice to see them do something along these lines in season 2.

  19. Anonymous says:

    Not only have I found the story I've been looking for since forever, but it turns out to be written by the author of one of my most favorite MLP stories. You have no idea how satisfying this is, my friend. ^-^And coming from you, I expect that ring to have some form of black speech written on it. XD

  20. TenchiFreak5 says:

    All of my stars, for oh so many reasons.

  21. Phroexx says:

    Well, I'll be sure to give it five stars once I'm done crying.

  22. Anonymous says:

    Dammit, Jetfire! How are you so freaking good at this?

  23. Ditzy Derp says:

    Ditzy eye's are like waterfalls!

  24. Josh says:

    Excellent story, but after Dangerous Business, I suppose that's to be expected from you.

  25. Anonymous says:

    My heart is melting. 🙂 5/5 starzAlso, i see an AWESOME sequel to dangerous buisness coming up, i just know it!

  26. Raven says:

    I bow to the artist of this excellent piece. I'm surprised we don't see more of this kinda stuff really. Ah well, wonderful story all the same!

  27. Dawnsinger says:

    I think you just broke my d'awww

  28. Anonymous says:

    Read this just after reading The Collection of my Centerpiece.I do not recommend it.

  29. Xi says:

    Now this here is prime setup material…. Jetfire you offer me a strawberry to asage a long fast…Sweet, but leaves me wanting for more more more!Still hoping for a long sequel to Dangerous Business.

  30. SharkWipf says:

    New Jetfire story?*Closes any form of communication and reads it in one run*Great story! Although I can't say for sure, I can imagine that a short story is a whole different business than a long one. Only thing I can say about that part is that you seem to be pulling of a superb job on both parts!I also enjoyed the Dangerous Business references, but well, how could I not, it (in my opinion) being the best story on EquestriaDaily and all. Can't wish for a better way to end my day. Thank you very much!

  31. Talia says:

    Oh this was cute!

  32. Enrique262 says:

    Very, very nice story, and I really loved those little references to "its dangerous", hope to hear more from you Jetfire!

  33. Anonymous says:

    This was cute and heartwarming, Saw a few typos here and there but it did not take away from the story.With that could Caracosa be the setting for the next Story in the "Dangerous Business Series"? Spike royalty? I like that

  34. Holy frack. That was amazing! Short and oh so sweet. I love Twilight portrayed as a mother, and this fic nailed it! No grammar issues either. 5 stars all the way. A must-read.

  35. Superlative job, as I have come to expect. I was really hoping that Dangerous Business wasn't going to be your one and only magnum opus, so I was delighted to see this. Especially with it being about Spike, who is one of my favourite characters. Please, do keep writing; your excellent is greatly appreiciated!

  36. SomeGuy says:

    And once again Jetfire knocks another fan fic out of the park. Seriously I think you broke the D'aaww meter with this. So much raw emotion, and further world building. Twilight is like Spike's adoptive mother isn't she. (I really hope that the show builds on this at some point.) I don't thing anyone has tackled this subject as expertly as you have now. You sir are one of, if not the best writer on the site. If/when you get a book published in real life I would be more then happy to pick it up.

  37. >Story: A Day for Spike and Twilight¬_¬>Author: Jetfire/)^3^(\

  38. Nicely done, Jetfire! You've done a splendid job connecting this story to your previous epic while still making it a wonderful stand-alone tale. It was sweet, earnest, and lovely. The only thing that remains is for Spike to return to Caracosa and come to terms with who he really is. Now *that* will be quite an adventure!P.S. As soon as Twilight said, "My darling boy", I was immediately reminded of this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CBwt9mBpVWM

  39. Cottonmouth says:

    One of the few fics I've read that actually deserves 6 stars.ED, don't fail me.

  40. Jordan says:

    Yet again, Jetfire has set himself apart as a great writer. Not a great fanfic writer–good fanfics are (gladly) common in this fandom–but a great writer in general. It's rare to find a person who understands how to write both great short stories and novella-length epics, yet he does so expertly.6/5 stars are well-deserved for this one: a line of thinking that, I think, many of us have overlooked, and wonderfully executed to boot. Keep on improving your skills, and I look forward to one day reading your published works.

  41. David says:

    Can't get enough Twilight/Spike material!I've always wondered; after Twilight and the other Mane Six have gone to their eternal rest, why couldn't Spike move back to Canterlot? Celestia and Luna aren't going anywhere any time soon.

  42. RedSavant says:

    Jetfire, once again you've done it. All the best elements from "Dangerous Business" are here – excellent characterization and tender character interaction, with intriguing hints of worldbuilding thrown into the mix – and none of the (admittedly very few) shortcomings of the original. An enthusiastic five stars, and may this reach the six it deserves.I'm looking forward to literally anything else you publish, whether it follows "Dangerous Business"' continuity or not. Write on, good sir or madam.

  43. Anonymous says:

    Quit.Making.Me.Cry.>:C(+5 stars)

  44. Cloudy Skies says:

    Dear Author,Thank you.Please find attached,All my stars.

  45. DSNesmith says:

    Oh, gawd, I lost it at "Happy Mother's Day". Another brilliant fic, well done.

  46. Jetfire says:

    Thank you for the kind responses.If you're wondering why Spike's being purple was of such concern to the assembled unicorns, here's a clue: dragons born purple don't stay purple.As for what's next, I have one other short story in mind that's not canon, and then I was going to start something… ambitious.

  47. Well, going by the Tolkienite etymology of the names, I have a pretty good idea what color purple dragons must become, then….. (assuming complete similarity, of course.)

  48. Jetfire says:

    @JetfireEr, hold on, I worded that strangely. When I said "not canon," I meant "not in the same continuity as Dangerous Business." My brain slipped a little.

  49. Tosanu says:

    Will the "ambitious" thing be in Dangerous Businees continuity, then? (pleasepleasepleasepleasepleaseplease)

  50. Icehawk says:

    @JetfireROFL, I was just about to post a question about that. Glad you caught yourself and also that I decided to refresh the screen again before posting. 🙂

  51. Jetfire says:

    @TosanuOh yes.I've been churning it through my mind since I was writing Dangerous Business. It's the sequel you've been waiting for, though it's not strictly an adventure story.

  52. zaptiftun says:

    Oh my gosh that was so freakin' adorably sweet.

  53. Anonymous says:

    Interesting bit of worldbuilding, and a cute story to boot. The Dragonsong definitely made me laugh out loud. "…One of the most beautiful languages in the world…" *insert text approximating pennies being gargled by a modem.*One comment, though. I don't feel like the "purple = special" thing works, though. At minimum, if color does have some special meaning for MLP dragons, wouldn't Greenie (the big dragon in Owl's Well that Ends Well) have had some reaction? I mean, I know dragons are greedy and wrathful, but that's kind of like a pony seeing an Alicorn prancing around and going on their merry way without comment.

  54. Popcorn says:

    Dawwww. The fact that Spike went to all of Twilight's friends for help planning the day is what really made this hit home with me. He usually hates the mushy, girly stuff but it was that important to him. And that was some nice world building with the history between Celestia and the Dragons. Thanks for another wonderful fic!

  55. DaBatGuy says:

    Can't stop the manly tears. Why you do this?100/5 stars.

  56. This is kind of what I was hoping to see a glimpse of in Owl's well that ends well.Regardless, oh my yes I love this fic. I had such a happy smile while reading it.Thanks for writing it!All the stars for you!

  57. Anonymous says:

    Thank you for writing this. This story needed to be told. I've been looking for fics. that address/focuses on Twilight and Spike's relationship.The part when Spike gave the gift, what followed, pure awesomeness.

  58. SomeGuy says:

    @JetfireJetfire what ever you write, whether connected to Dangerous Business or not, I am sure it will be aweseome.

  59. Florentine says:

    That was awfully nice. Family's a theme I wish the series explored more, but, I suppose it can't really, even if it isn't a theme unsuitable for its age range it isn't quite compatible with the status-quo they chose to set up. 'S the same reason I like Past Sins, really: family is a subject isn't really given the regard it ought be so far as I've seen.Thanks for that!

  60. Var says:

    Can I just say that the line 'have I taught him to be brave?' really tore me up inside. Loved it.

  61. Zanzibar says:

    This is a wonderful story. I always enjoy stories that go in depth with Twilights and Spikes relationship. They are just such an odd pair that their story and relationship just can't help but be interesting.I can't say that "mother and son" is the kind of feel I get from them in the show. "Sister and younger brother" is more what I'd say. But then again, nothing in the show has portrayed anything half as powerful as this, or the authors previous story, so the exact relationship is hard to judge.I love the explanation for how Spike was hatched as well. It makes sense that that was something entirely unexpected. Saddling magic students with their own dragon doesn't make sense. Then there'd have to be a whole lot of "tame" dragons in Equestria.

  62. Anonymous says:

    Beautiful. Saved. Here, have some gold stars. Five should cover it.

  63. ECE says:

    Great little story! Hope to see lots more from you.

  64. Big Sims says:

    I've been looking for a good story for a while based on the relationship between these two, and this author does NOT fail to disappoint! I imagined the entire story as if it were an entire episode. Very well done! And I would be lying if I said made me a little teary eyed…

  65. SomeGuy says:

    Wanted to write a better review of the story, so here goes.You are very descriptive in your story telling. I like how you weaved the narration into seamless scene transitions at the beginning when Twilight was looking for her friends. When all the other ponies were unavailable I got an idea of where you were going, but I had no idea how intimate and powerfully emotionally gripping it would become. You have continued to demonstrate your wonderful ability at both world building and character development adding to the cannon of your wondrously epic fan fic of Dangerous Business.A few other authors have looked into exploring the unusual family dynamic that exists between Twilight and Spike, but I have yet to see a writer tackle the subject with the grace shown here. I especially like how you also looked at both sides of the equation with Spike seeing Twilight as a mother and asking himself if he has been a good son. You have an amazing ability at conveying emotions with the written word. Subtlety describing every action of the characters so as to let the audience understand what is in their hearts and minds without explicitly saying it takes real talent.I also enjoyed how you also addressed the potential developmental ramifications of Spike being the only dragon in a society of ponies and being raised by said ponies. I don't think anyone else has explored that angle. I like how the narrative seamlessly moved between scenes in the early part of the story. And really just how the story progressed and built up the drama and excitement over time. I went through so many emotions while reading this fic. Each scene with Twilight and Spike evoking a warm pleasant response. At no time did I feel that the narrative was forced or convoluted.Having a sibling of my own I felt a certain emotional connection at the record player scene. Although I am yet to become a parent myself I have listened to enough stories from my own to understand some of the things that they felt while raising me, so I feel I can confidently say you have captured the feelings a parent has for their child in Twilight's thoughts near the end. Adding in Mother's Day was a nice touch. In sort, A Day for Spike and Twilight, is a wonderful story. An extremely exceptional tale that I greatly enjoyed reading, and an excellent addition to the MLP: FiM fan fiction library. It makes me hope even more that the subject of family is addressed at some point in the show, especially building on the relationship between Spike and Twilight. Thank-you Jetfire for providing the community with this wondrously beautiful story. I wish you all the best of luck on your future stories both MLP related and original works.

  66. Bitmun says:

    That was fantastic. It took a very complicated, mature and interesting issue, and tackled it gracefully and with true narrative poise, all while staying perfectly in character and sticking to the broad strokes of the feel of the source material. The callbacks to Dangerous Business were well executed, without being overdone or dragging the reader mentally away from the story.On the technical side, the pacing was excellent, the vocabulary felt natural and diverse, and the dialogue had excellent flow, which is what brings a lot of fanfics down. Also, it was beautiful. I am not sure if I want to cry or laugh.Fantastic. 7 stars.

  67. muninn says:

    MANLY TEARS WERE SHED. Thank you so much, jetfire! Your stories are among the best I've ever read, anywhere ❤

  68. Too many people think that "shipping" requires intimate lovemaking… and forget that all it needs is loving feelings of any kind.Thank you, dear author. Thank you for reminding me of that.

  69. This comment has been removed by the author.

  70. This was just incredibly sweet. I do hope the issue of how many such dragon assistants there are in the world is addressed in season 2.The phonograph scene had me thinking of Calvin and Hobbes dancing to classical music played at 78 RPM. :)I didn't quite understand Applejack's comment about needing some time out yesterday and nevermind because I just now figured it out. Okay, that said, I need to complain about holding back the Mother's Day thing for so long. I realize you were trying to create dramatic tension, but it's frustrating when the characters keep dancing around an issue they're all aware of, but won't tell the reader what they're talking about. AJ's "out back" was so vague I thought she was having some kind of, um… personal problem. You could have made it clear she was visiting her parents' graves without spoiling too much of the surprise, and I think it would have been okay to define the recipients of Twi's packages at the beginning.You've got some issues with bringing the narrative to a screeching halt while a big chunk of exposition crosses the road. The block about the dragon language was particularly egregious, and could have been (I think) woven in between the conversation, like you did with Celestia talking about dragon politics. Twilight explaining magivascular plants wasn't as bad, but the dissection scene lost a lot of momentum. I'm not sure an in-depth discussion of plant structure was necessary in order to show Twilight teaching Spike.Still 5 stars, mind you. 🙂

  71. Anonymous says:

    Loved the story. There aren´t that many Twilight and Spike fics out there, despite them having one of the most interesting realtionships in MlP, at least in my opinion that is.^^I so d´wwwwwwwwa'd at your description when they finaly talked about how they feel about each other, so darn cute~ <33333333I ship everything considering TwixSpike, may it be best Friends, Mother and Son, Sister and Brother or even as a lovey-dovey Couple. (Though Spike has to grown a bit more for a that ;))Hey, if it was possible in Shrek, why not also in MlP? Love is magical after all. XD

  72. Jetfire says:

    @LordOfTheWrongsDraketongue's explanation is a little academic, I'll admit- moreover, I'm not sure I got it right, since I'm not a linguist. I had some help from an Anonymous linguist over on /co/, but I'm still not sure I got it down right. Half the reason I included that was because Draketongue and its sung nature are holdovers from an old original high fantasy story I once tried to write. I'm a bit sentimental about it, especially the ideas for dragons I came up with.

  73. HOW DID YOU MAKE ME CRY LIKE A BITCH WITH A STORY ABOUT PONIES HOW DID THIS HAPPEN I AM NOT GOOD WITH EMOTION.Loved it. ;_;

  74. @JetfireWell, it made sense to this non-linguist.

  75. Escher says:

    Heh, at first when Fluttershy was being evasive about what she was going into the forest for, I thought, "Wait, what? Is Fluttershy secretly dating Zecora or something?!"

  76. artrcland says:

    With so much fan fiction being posted everyday and only so much time to devote to reading, I worry that some gem of a story will slip by. I don't know why I came back to this one. Maybe your moniker, Jetfire, rang a bell in my subconscious.All i know is, I'm glad I did! THIS MADE MY DAY!!!!!Thanks so much, I look forward to your next endeavor!

  77. Escher says:

    Okay, so I totally agree with LordOfTheWrongs about the concealment of what holiday it is being not only unnecessisary but actively harmful to the storytelling. AJ's pained look only makes sense if we know that, otherwise it's just confusing, and it's distant enough from the reveal that it didn't connect until I was looking back over the story. I thought maybe AJ was really missing Ashtail for some reason and then the plot wandered away without explaining.Maybe it was all meant to be a shiptease, but it just seems awkwardly done if that's the goal, and there really wasn't anything that tricked me into thinking there was any romance there (apart from the uncomfortable pre-dance thing, but even there I could tell I was being played, I just didn't know where it was going yet).That sort of gag has been done well before, in Candle To The Sun — in that case with Twilight trying to buy the perfect gift to express her feelings for Celestia, with the descriptions masterfully manipulated to make the reader erroneously infer that it's valentine's day.Unfortunately in this case it just comes off as annoying because the reader is not misled, just mystified. And it isn't like the characters in the story are unaware of what day it is.I also have to say that I didn't really buy Twilight having a perfect memory of a conversation from fifteen years ago that she wasn't a part of and didn't really understand at the time. A minor gripe, really.But! Whining aside, I really, really liked this story. Alternately cute, sweet, and melancholy, and very well written. Thank you.Oh, and by the way: Twilight Blopple? Spike's teasing name was Flopple, because her horn was floppy…And dragons live in Carcosa? As in The King In Yellow?! Gah…

  78. Anonymous says:

    Now that is 20ish minutes I don't care if I ever get back.

  79. VozDeSuenos says:

    There are a lot of fics I liked, but very few that I've liked enough to sneak into the Hub at night and replace a script with. This is one such story. Beautifully told and heartwarming. Thank you.

  80. Raiser XI says:

    I have one big question for you, lord jetfire… Is dangerous business set in the same universe as your first story here, the sun never sets?"Your's in Fellowship,"Raiser XI

  81. Anonymous says:

    @AnonymousWait, you DON'T care if you NEVER get it back? Meaning you liked the story?

  82. RedSavant says:

    Hey Jetfire, is there any way to get a hold of you aside from through these comment threads? I'm working on a fic about Gilda, and I happened to throw in a reference to the Drackenridge Mountains – so I figured I should ask you if that was alright. I don't intend it to be part of the "Dangerous Business" canon or anything, but I don't want to tread on your toes in any case.(Incidentally, Gildedale is now apparently semi-canon. http://blu3berrymuffin.deviantart.com/art/No-Way-Too-Far-4-of-5-251061231?q=gallery%3Ablu3berrymuffin%2F30696046&qo=1)

  83. Jetfire says:

    @RedSavantYou're more than happy to use anything I come up with. I'm not making any money off of it.Just be sure to give me credit.

  84. RedSavant says:

    Roger that, sir (madam?)!

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