Story: Magic Effect (Update Part 4!)

[Crossover][Grimdark][Sci-fi] More Mass Effect Ponies! Unlike the other story, it’s human in Equestria style.

Author: iheartfornax

Description: Through the workings of an ancient scroll, the world of ponies is transported to another universe. Will this cold, heartless, and uncaring void be the end of ponies everywhere? For to carve out a place of their own in this new galaxy, what ancient secrets, forbidden practices, and forgotten artifacts must see the light of day and night?

Magic Effect Part 1
Magic Effect Part 2
Magic Effect Part 3
Magic Effect Part 4 (New!)

Additional Tags: Long, Sci-fi, OC Ponies, Humans

This entry was posted in Author: iheartfornax, Celestia, Crossover, Grimdark, Human, Luna, OC Ponies, Other, Sci-Fi, Star-5, Story, Twilight Sparkle. Bookmark the permalink.

23 Responses to Story: Magic Effect (Update Part 4!)

  1. Anonymous says:

    Haven't read the story, but the picture of Tali riding Twilight is just pure epicness. Ima read the story now.

  2. fieryShaman says:

    Memetic hazards? Oh my.

  3. Shmoogy says:

    well i do enjoy tali……… i hope this has tali/twilight shipping >.> dont judge me brony

  4. Grif says:

    Interesting. I was wondering when someone will do the other potential take on this crossover.Heh heh, bookmarked for reading.

  5. mad i have waited about 5 days for a return thing for Seth for my 2 things a doc and picccccccccccc

  6. NinesTempest says:

    @ShmoogyIt's not bestiality if it's two sentient species!

  7. Anonymous says:

    I'm liking this so far, hope to see more.

  8. nemryn says:

    Sub-orbital bombardment actually doesn't really work that well when you're trying it against a Sun Goddess…

  9. Shmoogy says:

    @ ninestempestthats highy logical i will accept that idea

  10. Shmoogy says:

    @ ninestempestthats highy logical i will accept that idea

  11. Anonymous says:

    i don't get why a random slaver from a random slave ship would try to hold on to any secret (lol what secrets btw?) while tortured. Do they pay them that much? Or are they that idealistic?

  12. Arcesious says:

    I always did draw a parallel between Tali and TS. Glad to see I'm not the only one who did.

  13. Anonymous says:

    @AnonymousI don't know a lot about Batarians, but from what I do know it doesn't seem like much of a stretch that one of them would be this stubborn.

  14. Anonymous says:

    SO. MUCH. CANON DEFILING.Tim? Mass effect powered weapons? RARARARGH.

  15. Anonymous says:

    @Anonymousfrom what i can tell TIM is an acronym for The Illusive Man. For the weapons, if you read the codex for weapons in ME it explains that inside each weapon is a chunk of super heavy metal and a small bit of it (smaller than a piece of sand) is shaved off and fired using a mass effect field. So yeah it makes canonical sense

  16. Anonymous says:

    Mysterious star system appears out of nowhere where there had been none before. The physics of the system (sun orbiting the planet???) are so improbable that they MUST be artificial. And the first thing the ME people think is "We must loot the place!" instead of "Holy shit! Let's not annoy whoever built this place!"What the hell???

  17. Anonymous says:

    @ a href #c658171646705768044 >Anonymous /a>Actually it makes total sense if you read up your ME stuff

  18. Pride says:

    I had the pleasure of reading this as a proofreader; a gentlebrony known as iheartfornax one day checked something in Arddun Lleuad, and subsequently gave me the formatting for the entire book. Hence I offered to proofread something of his, and I accepted his offer.It started out as a standard affair beginning, which was good enough, however halfway through the story suddenly The Illusive Man is mentioned and I'm left sitting there with my face blown off wondering what the hell just happened.It turned out that my wife and I had been playing ME2 religiously at that point in our lives, so subsequently with this sudden serendipity I was rushed to the hospital to have my heart pushed back from it's new home in my throat.Perhaps I was still reeling from that incident, but the rest of the story seemed just as good as we experience it had given me to begin with. Naturally when approaching a story like this you have to give a lot of thought and interest to how the entire universe works, meshing the two universes together and giving the meaningful, believable descriptions is the biggest hurdle to jump, and I feel this has accomplished it quite well, even though I know how much research iheartfornax did to write this, I would get that impression even if I did not proofread this. There are some grey areas but this is no fault of the author's by any stretch of the imagination.As a story it really goes against my idea of Equestria, since the author has aimed for a Crapsaccharine world where what lies above in the happy wonderful lovely world of equestrian isn't necessarily what lies below, in the hearts and minds of its rulers and governors. I think the fact that it has such a dark take on Equestria sets it apart from being a normal crossover; not only is it a Mass Effect crossover, but also a unique take on Equestria, and the two of these elements in the story go very much hand-in-hand.It's a good sign when a pre-reader ends up simply reading a story instead of keeping the mindset that he is meant to be pre-reading, and that is exactly what happened to me whilst pre-reading this.I genuinely look forward to reading more as new chapters are released.- Pride

  19. Anonymous says:

    I don't know. Some of the Mass Effect lore seemed pretty off. I have never heard the Illusive Man being referred as Tim.

  20. LOG says:

    The torture scene in this fic gives me such trouble. It's just so…sudden. Just out of freaking nowhere they decide to go Mengele on the batarian. I don't hold any particular sympathy for the batarian, but they're not even torturing him for specific information as far as I can tell. It's just like "Oh look, a person who knows things that could potentially, maybe, prove useful. LET'S TORTURE THE CRAP OUT OF HIM!!!!" It's just so far out of character and mood, I can't accept it. Which is particularly disappointing because otherwise I liked the way the fic was looking.

  21. Anonymous says:

    The ponies have been interrogating the Batarian the whole day, when it was night time Luna finally decided that torture was the only way to get anything out of him. And Batarians are assholes, I'd torture one just for fun. They deserve what happened to them in Arrival.

  22. Anonymous says:

    Wow. Somehow, I never had Celestia pegged as someone who could go from "nought" to "sadist" in just three chapters.

  23. Hertzila says:

    One thing that bothers me: there's no explanation to how the batarians or TIM understands ponies, unless the ponies suddenly speak English. Even if that was the case, the ponies wouldn't understand batarians. Their equivalent of Esperanto (trade tongue) is too simple for broad topics and even then only most speak it (and how would ponies know it anyway?). The rest is translated on the fly, humans speaking English/Japanese/Finnish/whatever, batarians… batarese or something, turians turianese etc. and the translators take care of everything. Somehow I doubt the ponies would have those translators.So, handwave it with magic or something, if you would? Similarly you could add a bit of surprise to The Illusive Man's reaction to both understanding each other.I've never heard The Illusive Man being called TIM/Tim in games but I'm willing to buy that it's used for casual conversation. Somehow I doubt TIM himself would like it much, though. Takes a bit away from the image.Othar than that, it seems fairly good, though I'm not sure I like your idea of Equestria. We'll see, I guess.

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