Story: Pain In The Tail

[Shipping][Random Crossover] Applelotus! Kind of!

Author: Nightbreak

Description: After Applebuck Season, Applejack’s pretty banged up and is ordered to take it easy for a few days. Of all ponies, it’s Rarity who has an idea about how to make her feel a bit better.

Pain In The Tail

Additional Tags: Hurt/Comfort, Applejack, Lotus, Insane Epilogue

This entry was posted in Applejack, Author: Nightbreak, Complete, Crossover, Lotus, Random, Rarity, Shipping, Star-4, Story. Bookmark the permalink.

48 Responses to Story: Pain In The Tail

  1. Anonymous says:

    YAY! More Lesbian ponies! Zippity-FRIGGIN-Doo-Da!

  2. Anonymous says:

    @AnonymousNot like there's a huge roster of male ponies to work with.

  3. Anonymous says:

    @AnonymousRule Idea: No Shipfics

  4. Anonymous says:

    Huh? I don't follow….Insane indeed.

  5. Derptastic says:

    Great story! …. THAT ENDING???

  6. I honestly don't see it as very shippy.And I agree with Derptastic: THAT ENDING!!!

  7. Wat.It's like someone wrote a story, then decided "This needs more robots"So they added robots.My brain is derp.

  8. Kyle says:

    Huh, so far so good… Decent pacing, the characters personalities seem consistant with their canon selves… So far, so good. Just a little piece of fl-Wait, epilogue time…What?What?WHAT?!

  9. Anonymous says:

    Suddenly, robots….

  10. Feloua says:

    Well, that was certainly, something.

  11. Anonymous says:

    Transformers? In My Little Ponies?It's more likely than you think.

  12. Anonymous says:

    Banged up? So shes pregnant? No? Then gtfo you did it wrong

  13. Anonymous says:

    This was great until it got unnecessarily crazy at the end. The ending kinda ruined it all. And it´s also not shipping.

  14. Bunnylisk says:

    Did somebody edit the ending as a prank? Please tell me it was a prank.

  15. Kalianos says:

    Well that was…interesting. Not really shipping.But it took me a few seconds to realize that there is something really off.Why is there transformers in my MLP?

  16. Anonymous says:

    First I was like Whoa!Then I was like whoa.And then I was like…whoa…

  17. Lovely story; it's rare you get to see Applejack being vulnerable. And that epilogue was, indeed, insane!

  18. Anonymous says:

    There is random, end then there is that epilogue.I like it 🙂

  19. Robin says:

    "Oh, spice and cinnamon, that rattled her teeth!"howHOWHOW did you manage to so consistently match up Applejack's characterization with the show? It was a real joy to get in her head for a bit ❤ <3also . . . . MARES! DIG! GI-ANT RO-BOTS @.@

  20. ShadowFox04 says:

    Well that was a rather nice story, a nice little bit of character development, now, 3 months later… What?Always nice to have a bit of random thrown in.

  21. Anonymous says:

    A great story about Applejack getting a massage. Didn't really notice any shipping, though.

  22. Anonymous says:

    >"Will you catch me if I start going down again?">"Always."D'aww!

  23. wolfemann says:

    …Tell me there's a Part 2 coming. I *have* to see where the delightfully sudden influx of insanity is going. 🙂

  24. NB says:

    @wolfemannYes, my brain has come up with a sequel, after I hit 'complete'. 😛 Rainbow Dash is up next!

  25. NB says:

    @AnonymousI decided to tag it shipping, although I did also say that the shipping is 'if you tilt your head, squint, and wish really really hard'. Think of it as Applejack being open to considering her options. When someone takes away your pain, you see them in a different light.

  26. Anonymous says:

    The story was absolutely brilliant. I thought Applejack was fantastically represented, as was Rarity.The ending utterly ruined it.. can only give 3 stars.

  27. NB says:

    @Anonymous @ 6:57 and othersThanks for reading. I'm very happy you found the main body of the story to your liking. Applejack would be the last person to visit the Luxury spa, so I wanted it brought to her. :DIf you hate the epilogue, then I am sorry. I may have gotten caught up in an idea and tried to extend it too far, but perhaps Rainbow Dash's story will explain a bit more, once I get that written. Also, I couldn't resist, really. I mean, Hasbro did give us Applejack's fugly pink truck toy for a reason! It was either that or Rainbow Dash discovers that the Wonderbolts are cyborgs and that her dream to join them would mean being 'upgraded' (Idea free to a good home. :P)

  28. Bryan says:

    This was a great little story (aside from the incoherent epilogue, which I ignored – sorry, NB, but it simply didn't fit with the rest of the story in any way shape or form. Should probably be part of a separate story).However, I too have no idea why this would be called "shipping". Applejack just got a massage and made the accquaintance of the massuse. You could call almost any interaction between ponies "shipping" by that standard.

  29. NB says:

    @BryanI don't blame you for feeling that way, on either count. My comment on the Applelotus being 'if you tilt your head, squint, and wish very hard' just didn't make it through the tagging process, I think. I may have been too general in that assessment.

  30. Anonymous says:

    I saw the ending as more of a "Life goes on" sort of thing, even if that life includes battling Transformers, one of whom is apparently the pink truck that comes with the Applejack toy.

  31. KoshLovesYou says:

    I liked it, but that crazy ending threw me for a loop. That was too bad, the story was otherwise symetrical and well paced!

  32. NB says:

    @KoshLovesYouThanks. … and give me some time. I might yet redeem myself for that last bit. 😀

  33. Anonymous says:

    Why hello there WTF ending.

  34. Patriot Dash says:

    Well the only interesting thing that actually happened was the epilogue. Sorry to say but that was a very boring story : /

  35. This is great. The look into Applejack's head and the intimacy of the massage were pleasures to read, and while the fic didn't end up being very shippy, you've now got me thinking about Applejack and one of the spa twins and that's probably going to cause some trouble down the road.But that epilogue alone deserves all the stars. You are a mad genius.

  36. Anonymous says:

    While I greatly enjoyed the read, I can't really say anything that hasn't been said before: Not really shipping, very good look into Applejack (and I totally read this in her voice) and what drugs exactly were you on while writing that "epilogue"?Good story, coherence a bit ruined by the LOL LOOKIT ME SO RANDUM ending. 4/5 – 5/5 for the main story, to be honest.

  37. NB says:

    @Anonymous at 2:39It was sort of a pre-emptive shipping tag. I was anticipating people saying 'why isn't there a shipping tag on this?'. Of course, now I have "Why is there a shipping tag on this?' There was some reasoning behind the 'madness' of the epilogue, but I understand that it really feels random. But I'm afraid I had that crack from earlier on ED about Applejack's pink toy truck being a Transformer stuck in my head and there's a very nice pic of the Lotus twins being badasses. It just sort of merged. Like I said, let me see if I can make some sense out of that for you all with some time.Patriot Dash: Oh, dear. Sorry you were bored. I do appreciate you taking your time to slog through it, though, plus leaving the comments.Uncle Friendly: Glad you liked it from beginning to end. That sort of surprise isn't everyone's taste and it's a lesson I keep learning.

  38. Nutjob says:

    Screw that noise.The story was wonderful, Applejack seemed spot-on and Rarity seemed quite Rarity-like, for what we did see. And the description of tension flowing out of AJ's body wasn't just effectively written, it was relaxing and soothing to read. Hell, it actually made *my* spine feel better just for reading it.That ending was awesome. Sure, it was crazy-crack out of nowhere, but who the hell says we can't have bizarre crossovers? We've already had Fallout, Doctor Who, Dragon Age… If you can't have GIANT HOOFING ROBOTS in ponyville, you also can't have a blue police box, I say.Hell, I'm trying to write up something that has Luna poisoned or feverish, and hallucinating the Mane Six as reformed Hell's Angels on a vengeance quest.

  39. Anonymous says:

    Yeah, totally called the ending.

  40. Kyle says:

    To clarify my earlier post… Yeah, the ending is a random bag filled with doorknobs and WTF smacked directly in your face, but I got a good laugh out of it. The main story was good in a calm, realistic way and the epilogue was good in it's "WHAT THE CHRIST AM I READING?!" zaniness. Five stars.

  41. Anonymous says:

    @AnonymousUhhh… "banged up" means injured. "Knocked up" means pregnant. L2P, noob. :)I didn't read any shipping at all in here, seriously.

  42. NB says:

    @Anonymous @ 2:15I tagged it shipping to head off the questions of 'why isn't this tagged shipping', but instead I've ended up with 'why is this tagged shipping?' I guess I was being pre-emptive for something that didn't really materialize. However, if people wish it, it could be. You just have to really be wearing goggles. 😀

  43. Anonymous says:

    not really shipping, and the epilog was…strange. kind of tacked on. really I feel it hurt a otherwise very good normal almost episode quility fic.

  44. NB says:

    @AnonymousYou're mostly right. I probably should have let the fic sit another day or so and really consider whether or not the epilogue was right for the situation. I usually do, but I think I rushed this.

  45. Colt.45 says:

    At first I was annoyed by that ending, but then I was like, "Well, if your gonna start something, you better finish it!" So yeah, now i'm super curious about what the ending would lead to. Oh, and the actual story was eh. Nicely written, but rather boring and pointless, especially thanks to THAT ENDING.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s